More Than Alive
by xxShonaNinjaxx
Summary: The world Light was trying to save was nothing more than an illusion. He's been thrown from one world into the next- the real world. Truths he never could have imagined are real, people he thought long dead are alive, and his mission as Kira has been turned completely upside down. In the real world, haunted by the past, and facing a new future. This should be interesting. L x Light
1. Chapter 1

**Welcome to my death note crossover! A few warnings before we begin.**

**If you are not into shipping, yaoi, genderswapping, or anything of the like, then it's best if you leave right now. This fic contains all three. However, if you think the story will be worth it, then by all means read on. Have fun.**

***ShonaNinja***

More Than Alive - Chapter 1

It was late. The sun had set, and the sky had been dark for quite some time. The noise of the city outside rushed along with the wind, hurried as always. But somehow, it all felt peaceful. Light Yagami was finally alone.

It seemed it was the first time in days that he had time to himself. He'd finally managed to get away from the prying eyes of the task force, Mikami's obsessive messaging, Misa's constant fawning, and millions of other nameless forms of unwanted attention. At least after he'd gotten rid of Mello a week earlier, Takeda had gone along with him. The demand wasn't nearly so bad with her out of the way. But it didn't matter. This was still exhausting, even with one weight lifted from his shoulders.

And now here he was, alone at last, his laptop sitting at his desk before him. He sighed and reclined in his swivel chair. He'd never realized how truly exhausting being Kira would be. He closed his eyes and breathed in. Peace, even if just for a few minutes. It was nice.

Light opened his eyes and straightened up. He couldn't stay like this for long. Mikami would be sending him a message any minute now. He'd told him to notify him of every criminal he killed according to his orders, and he'd kept to the schedule like clockwork. Every night, 9 PM Japan time, he received an email from him, a firewall set to protect their identities. Tonight was especially important. He would be meeting Near tomorrow, N, the one who had been watching him for months now. Mikami had better have gotten his message. If he knew the truth, Near would die the moment they meet. Light just knew it.

He flipped open his laptop and waited as it slowly powered up. He opened his secondary email as soon as the wifi signal picked up. He stared blankly at his email page, waiting impatiently for the message. Minutes passed. For the first time ever, Mikami was late. Light sighed again and spun his chair away from the computer. He was too tired to deal with this.

A chime sounded from close behind him. Light picked his head up and looked over his shoulder. The high, mechanized tone sounded again. He had a new message.

Light quickly spun around and rolled his chair back toward his desk. He had to see Mikami's email and delete it fast, cautious even when he knew not even the task force themselves could break through the firewall. He clicked on the small icon on the screen to open his inbox. A highlighted line glowed above all the others, identifying itself as a new message. Light squinted at the sending address. Something was different.

He stared at the line of text. It wasn't Mikami's dummy address that he had created to throw off the police. In fact, it didn't appear to be an email address at all. It looked like complete gibberish, random letters, numbers and symbols, as if someone were trying to create an email and had a seizure in the middle of typing a username.

Light stared at the address, unsure of whether to click on it or not. Something felt suspicious about it. Something was wrong.

He shook the feeling away. It just didn't make sense. He wasn't even sure if randomized text could be used as an address. The only thing he could do was investigate. Light shrugged and clicked on the email.

Almost immediately the screen went black.

"Ah!" Light jumped in his seat, startled. He sat there, staring at the darkened screen for a moment, trying to piece together what had just happened. He'd clicked on a strange email, and then his computer crashed. He ran through a list of possibilities, trying to find a rational cause. Nothing made sense. He plugged a charger cord into the computer's side, though he could have sworn the laptop was fully charged. Nothing. The screen simply remained black. "What the hell?"

Light dragged a hand across the trackpad, pressed a few keys, the power button, shut the laptop and opened it again, and checked the power cord again. Still nothing. "God dammit," he mumbled, irritated. "Now? Of all times, this has to happen now?"

Light pushed his chair away from the desk once again and dropped his head into his hands. "I can't believe this. I can't fucking believe this."

He looked back up at his laptop and stared into the endless blackness of the screen. Something caught his attention. A small flash of color appeared on the blank, darkened screen. Light took a closer look. There it was again. A small, glowing green cursor had appeared in the upper-left corner of the screen. It blinked invitingly. Light stared, unsure of what to do. He lifted his hands to the keyboard and lay his fingers over the keys to type a single word._ Hello?_

The cursor obediently printed out the letters on the screen. Light stared at the screen, unsure of what to expect next. A few seconds later, his words disappeared from the screen. A new cursor appeared, flashing bright white against the dark background. It stayed there for a second, then scrolled to the right, glowing white text trailing behind it.

_Hello, Light Yagami._

Light stared at the screen, dumbstruck. His head was spinning. He scrambled for an explanation, but nothing would come. A virus? A hacker? But he'd been prepared for everything. The firewall, his virus scanner, every defense against this that he'd spent forever building up, all gone in one night? Impossible. He splayed his fingers over the keyboard again. _What did you do to my computer?_

Seconds passed, and the green text cleared. The white text appeared again.

_It's only temporary._

The text cleared. Light typed another message._ How long will it last?_

_As long as it needs to, Light._

Light narrowed his eyes, staring at the black screen._ Who are you?_

_I am L._

Light's eyes widened. His hands tightened into fists over the keyboard. This wasn't L. It couldn't be. He himself had taken L's place and hidden his death from the world. N knew about it, of course. It seemed that he always had. Could this be him, deciding to hack him instead of meeting in person? Light unclenched his fists and typed another message. _No, it's not. L is dead. Who are you, really?_

_Like I told you, Light. I am L._

_How do you know my name?_

_I know a lot of things about you. I know that you're not really in love with Misa. I know that you don't really work for the task force either. Mikami works for you, as did Misa. And I know that you are Kira._

Light's heart stopped. His hands froze over the keys. No. He couldn't believe this. After all he'd done to hide his identity... _Fine. I am Kira. There. Now tell me who you are. Tell me or I will kill you._

_I am L._

_No you're not._

_Stop playing games, Light. I may not have much longer._

The text cleared again. Light stared at the blank, darkened screen. Who was this person, and why were they doing this? He typed a new message. _Well?_

_Your future lies in another world, Light. You are not where you are meant to be._

_So where am I meant to be?_

_You will know when the time comes. Tomorrow, when you awaken, look just outside of your door. An unmarked package will be on your doorstep. Inside you will find a black pill. Take this pill immediately. The task force will arrive shortly to escort you to the Yellow Box._

Light read the text over again. He grabbed a slip of paper from the desk and scribbled down the instructions. The text cleared. Light typed another message. _What then?_

_You will see. My time is up. Goodbye, Light._

The text cleared. A flash of panic sparked in the back of Light's mind. His hands flew across the keyboard. _Wait. Who are you?_

_L._

The text disappeared and the black screen flashed away. Light's email reappeared. The strange message had disappeared. A new email had taken its place. Light clicked on it. It was from Mikami. He'd gotten the message about Near. He would be there tomorrow.

Light deleted the message. He didn't need to respond. He was done with today. He shut down his laptop. He heard the door downstairs open, and then shut. Misa was home from her photo shoot. Misa's shrill voice sounded from the entryway. "Light? I'm home! Light?"

Light stood up and stretched himself out. Well, that was the end of the short time he had to himself. Still, he pondered over the stranger's words. They had to be lying. It couldn't have been L. He'd been dead for five years. Yet, even as he repeated the thought over and over as he walked downstairs to greet Misa, something told him that it really was true.

0o0o0o0o0

The sun was setting. Through the small, frosty windows of a bare, concrete stairwell, colored light streamed in, dyeing everything inside a thousand shades of red, gold and purple. It seemed eerily coordinated to the bruised, bloody body of a young man lying lifeless on the stairs.

A voice sounded from the dimness. "This is him?"

Another voice spoke, a lower tone than the other. "Yep. He looks different when he's dead, doesn't he?"

"I have to say he does. Probably still just as much if an asshole as in life though," the first voice said. It traveled through the air with a dark, silky grace. A figure stepped out into the light. It was a girl, slim and willowy, dressed completely in black, the red light spilling through the windows staining her cap of golden-blonde hair a glowing shade of orange.

"Hm. Maybe. Or maybe he's finally realized what he's been doing all this time. He might know that he's paying for his crimes. You never really know." The source of the second voice emerged from the shadows. A boy around the girl's age broke away from the darkness, his dark, blood-red hair sharply contrasting his black outfit.

"It won't matter anyway," the girl said, walking towards the body on the stairs. "He'll be different once he's reached the other side. They always are." She crouched down and leaned in towards the his face. She brushed his blood-soaked brown hair away from his eyes. "Light Yagami. I never thought I would see him like this."

The boy approached her and knelt across from her on the other side of the body. He reached into his pocket and removed some gadget that appeared to be a smartphone. He laid it on the young man's deathly still chest. A second ticked by, and an alarm sounded from the device. The boy glanced at the screen. "He's gone."

"Did he take the pill?"

"I don't know. I hope we didn't take Tempest all the way to the drop-off just for a false alarm."

"Scan him."

The boy placed his fingers on the young man's forehead. He closed his deep blue eyes and focused. Suddenly he relaxed. His eyes opened as he breathed a sigh of relief. "Yeah, he took it."

"Well, that's new. I didn't think he'd believe the message we sent him."

"Neither did I."

The girl stood up. "We should go. The paramedics will be here any second."

"Good idea." The boy stood up as well and moved away from the dead body, taking the girl's hand. "Besides, we've done all we can. We should be getting back to the ship."

The girl slipped an arm around the boy's waist and kissed his cheek. "Of course." She looked over her shoulder at Light, now nothing more than a lifeless shell covered in blood lying in a stairwell. "Sleep tight, Light. You're going to need it."


	2. Chapter 2

More Than Alive- Chapter 2

Light was drifting. He wasn't exactly sure where he was. He couldn't remember a thing. The last thing he remembered was fear, regret, longing, and more than anything, the blinding pain. Wishing that he could take back everything that he'd done before it was too late, the blood spreading everywhere as the world blurred and faded and suddenly his heart...

But everything was gone now. Light felt nothing. No pain, no sadness. Warmth. Floating. Soothing darkness. He thought that he could hear the faint sound of a pulse.

_So this is what the afterlife is like. No heaven or hell. Not so bad. Kind of nice, actually._

So this was where he'd spend eternity. It wasn't nearly as torturous as he'd thought before. He just wished that he could open his eyes.

Light stirred. Something about the space surrounding him felt strange. He moved again. His hand dragged through some kind of thick, jelly-like fluid. This didn't feel right. Suddenly the warm, dark space wasn't so comforting.

Light kicked blindly into the unseeable space. He slammed his foot against something hard and smooth. No. This wasn't right.

He couldn't take this anymore. The suspense was killing him. Light forced his eyes to open.

Red, burning light seared his vision. His eyes stung. Light thrashed viciously and opened his mouth to scream. No sound came out. His throat burned. Something was jammed down it, forcing his lungs to breath at a normal rate. Thick, metallic threads tangled around his arms and legs, restricting him.

Light pressed up against the top of whatever it was that contained him. The soft, gel-like casing tore easily. Light scratched at it, tearing apart the membrane and forcing himself upright. The air outside was freezing cold. Needles of ice dug into his skin as he fought his way out. He grabbed the device in his mouth and dragged it up. It was a long plastic tube, and it hurt as he pulled it out and threw it aside. He felt an odd, electrical sting at random points all over his body. Light looked down at himself. He was sitting in an egg-shaped pod filled with a reddish slime. He was covered in it...and completely naked. He pulled his knees toward his chest, trying to cover himself up against the cold. There were strange steel wires floating in the sludge, wrapped around his body and- plugged into his skin?

All over him, on his arms, legs, chest, stomach, and along his spine, he saw the edges of dark metal sockets, each trailing one of the collection of wires tangled together in the pod. He pulled at them, trying to free himself. They stung and sparked, the pain making it impossible to remove them. Gasping, Light finally scraped together the courage to look up and see his surroundings.

His pod was set into the wall of a huge tower, extending hundreds of feet toward the sky, which was dark, blackened by storm clouds crackling with electricity. Across from Light's tower was another, just as tall, and right next to it another tower. There were towers surrounding him, all of them emitting a strong, pale red glow. All the towers were covered in strange cell-like pods, just like Light's. Light looked to his left. The pod beside his was glowing, lighting up the dark silhouette of a human, floating motionless inside. His head whipped to face right. He was greeted by the same horrifying sight. Light collapsed and fell back into his fluid-filled pod, shocked. This couldn't be real. It couldn't be. Before Light could think any further, he felt a strange pulse at the back of his head. He reached behind himself, and his fingers collided with hot metal. A single oversized plug was connected to the back of his head, connected by a thick steel cable to the wall behind the pod. Suddenly the pulse strengthened and the plug began to move. Light jerked his hand away only to be overcome by an explosion of pain.

All at once, every plug embedded into his skin began tearing themselves out of their sockets. Light screamed, thrashing uselessly in the pod, unable to control himself against the pain. The large plug at the back of his head made a noise, then he felt it shift and remove itself from its socket, shooting a final shockwave through him. Light went limp as the hot electric shock ran through him. He couldn't move, couldn't breathe, not even when the valve at the back of the pod opened and the fluid drained away, dragging him along with it.

Light had no idea what was happening. He felt himself drifting, half-conscious, being swept off down what felt like a cold metal waterslide. Falling. Landing in icy water with a hard splash. Light couldn't breathe. Water flooded into his mouth. He choked and flailed his arms and legs, trying desperately to stay afloat. His face broke the surface. He coughed up at least a gallon of water and gasped for air. Light forced his eyes to open again. He was in what looked like a giant storm drain, a massive cube with concrete walls, pipes placed randomly around the walls, spilling cold, silvery water into the frigid pool where Light was floundering to keep his head above water.

Light felt his body starting to stiffen. The cold was becoming too much, stinging his skin and leaching his strength away. Light felt himself slipping under. He kicked uselessly at the deep, ice-cold water, too weak to even keep his head above the surface. He gasped, taking in as much air as he could before going under.

For a second he was floating, helpless, sinking slowly into the dark, icy pool. Then something changed. A blinding white light flooded the water. Light felt huge robotic fingers wrapping themselves tightly around him. The water began to rush past him, then he felt the surface of the water break against his skin, and the water began to run off. He inhaled weakly, trying to regain sense to his waterlogged brain. Forget it. There's nothing I can do.

He felt the heat of the bright searchlight at the palm of the huge robotic claw that carried him, dragging him off to some unknown destination. Light's eyes drifted shut. I don't even care where this thing is taking me. I don't even care. Anywhere but here...

A mechanical motor noise rose above the sound of falling water. The robotic fingers let go, and he dropped and landed on a flat, cool surface. He felt warm water wash over him and someone's hands wrap a towel around him. He let out a small moan and shivered, too weak to do anything else. He heard voices all around him.

"We've got him. He looks intact enough."

"His body temperature has dropped 5.3 degrees, minor oxygen shortage in his brain..."

"His breathing's pretty shallow. Don't think he'll need a mask though."

Light felt hands grasping at him, lifting him from the flat surface and dropping him on something soft. He felt warmer almost instantly. Whatever it was that he was lying on had reflected nearly all of his body heat back to him. The world slowly began to come back to him. He managed enough strength to open his eyes again.

His vision was gray and blurry. Random spots of light and shadow raced around his vision as it slowly grew clearer. A shadow hovered over him, gradually beginning to take shape.

Light's vision snapped into focus. He looked up at the person leaning over him. It was a man, not much older than him. He seemed oddly familiar. Pale skin, a vacant expression on his face. Deep grey eyes lined with dark circles stared down at him from behind a curtain of messy black hair. Light's eyes widened.

"Ryu... zaki?"

Everything went black.

0o0o0o0o0

Light wasn't exactly sure what happened afterwards. He spent the next few hours drifting back and forth somewhere between sleep and consciousness. For a minute somewhere in the middle, he'd been almost completely awake. His eyes were open, and he could hear the stifled blip of a heart monitor somewhere in the distance. He'd seen the person from before, the one who looked exactly like... He'd never learned his name. Ryuzaki. That's how he remembered him. He'd been looking down at him, a smile playing at his lips. He thought he'd said something. His lips had moved, but Light couldn't hear his words or make anything out before his eyes had fallen shut again.

When Light woke up again, he was lying somewhere soft, facing a wall, a blanket wrapped around him. He untangled his arms from the blanket and stretched them over his head. His whole body felt stiff, as if he'd been lying there for hours. He was in a small, empty room, nothing there except for a small cube-shaped table set into the floor next to the bed where he was. There were two doors, one smaller than the other with a mirror set into it and no doorknob, only a ridge to slide it open. The other looked just like any other. The entire room was one color, a pale winter gray. A quick look under the blanket told him that he was still naked, except for a white towel that had been tied around his waist to cover up the important parts. Light rolled over to face the wall again and curled up, trying to get his thoughts together. Where was he? All he remembered was being shot, running, his heart seizing up, then he'd ended up in that strange pod, then the pool, now here. Was this really the afterlife? Or had he ended up somewhere else entirely?

Before he had time to think any further, he heard the latch of the larger door click. It swung open, flourescent light pouring into the room. Light rolled over again to face the opposite wall. Standing in the doorway was the silhouette of a girl. She was carrying something. The door shut again and the girl flipped the light on. "Well, look who finally decided to wake up."

She was medium-height, slim and willowy, moving towards him with an easy, catlike grace. She wore a black sweater with red metallic threads woven in and a pair of fraying skinny jeans. Her hair was a silky, honey-blonde cap, a fringe falling over her dark brown eyes that stared at Light with curiosity. She was oddly boyish, with short hair, faint curves and a nearly flat chest, yet somehow Light couldn't mistake her for a boy if he tried.

She moved closer. "I brought you a present." She dropped the bundle she was carrying onto the small table. It was a pile of clothes. "You and L are around the same size, so we all figured you two could share until we can get our hands onto something for you."

Light's head was reeling. "What are you talking about?" he murmured, staring up at the girl. "Who are you? Where am I? And... who's L?"

The girl tilted her head and stared at him. "Wow. You seriously don't remember a thing?" She crossed her arms over her flat chest and leaned against the wall. "You remember me at all?"

Light stared at her, searching his memory. He could have sworn he had never seen this girl before in his life. "N- no."

She let out a soft laugh. "Mello?" she said, grinning. "I was the second-to-top student at Wammy? The Mafia? I kidnapped your sister. You killed me with a driving accident, then had Takeda set fire to everything. Don't tell me you don't remember that."

"M-Mello?" If anything, Light at least remembered that Mello had been a guy. Besides, he was dead. Mello was long gone. "No. No you're not."

"Damn. Should have thought that you wouldn't recognize me like this. Everyone in that world would remember me as a guy, anyway. Maybe if I'd actually graduated from Wammy it could have been different." She leaned over and sorted through the clothes on the table. "I'll leave you alone to get dressed. Come out whenever you feel ready." She turned to leave.

Light sat bolt upright and stretched his hand out. "Wait. Don't go."

The girl stopped and turned back toward him. "What is it?"

"You didn't answer any of my questions."

"Alright." The girl walked back and sat down on the bed. "What do you want to know?"

Light sorted through the hundreds of questions buzzing around in his head. "First of all... Where am I and how did I get here?"

"That's easy. You're in the real world. And you're here because of the black pill that you took the day that you died."

Light froze. "The real... what?"

"The real world. The world you were in before, where you grew up and lived your life, was basically a virtual dream. Nothing but one massive simulation. Called the Matrix."

"The- the Matrix?" He had never heard of that before. "What is the Matrix?"

The girl laughed. "That's what everyone always wants to know."

Light shook away the shock and went on to the next question. "Okay. Next.. who is L?"

"Wow. This again? I really thought you'd remember him." The girl shrugged.

"No, I'm serious!" Light protested. "Who is L? The night before- whatever happened- some hacker crashed my computer and started sending me messages. He called himself L."

"So it should be obvious. It was L."

"No it wasn't. L is... L is dead."

The girl placed a hand on his shoulder, a fierce glow in her eyes. "That's exactly what he wanted you to think... Kira." She pulled away, laughing, watching as Light stared, wide-eyed in shock. Who the hell is this girl? How does she know about me...

"Who are you?"

The girl flashed him a smile. "I told you already. My name is Mello." She stood up from the bed and moved over toward the door again.

"Wait." Light said. The girl turned around and faced him. He took a breath. "Why am I here?"

"Well, Light, that's for you to decide." Then she- Mello- opened the door and left.

Light sat there for a moment, frozen, confused beyond belief. He finally managed to get a hold of himself. He tore the blanket off of himself and stood up, shaking the towel away and pulling on the clothes Mello had brought. He was here now. There was nothing he could do but investigate. He walked in front of the small mirrored door next to the one to the hallway. It slid open to reveal a small closet, which was completely empty.

Light slid it closed, the mirror coming back into view. He took in his reflection. He looked almost no different. The same chocolate brown eyes stared back at him, the same perfect face, the same body covered by the worn-in jeans and bleach-splattered tee Mello had given him. Only one thing had changed. Instead of the rich brown fringe brushing over his forehead, there was nothing but a thin, soft layer of fuzz covering his head. Light ran a hand over the pale, downy layer. He looked down at his forearm. A dark, shiny circle stood out from the soft peachy color of his skin. There was another one on his other arm. The sockets from before were still there. Light pulled back the sleeves of the shirt, the legs of his jeans, even pulling up the shirt hem to look at his chest and spine. They were all still there. Light's hand impulsively reached behind him to touch the back of his head. The large plug embedded into the nape of his neck was still there. He ran his fingers over its circuitry. So it hadn't been a dream.

Light turned toward the hallway door. He didn't feel like wasting any more time in here. He reached for the knob and opened the door to the hallway outside.

**Alright, let me get one thing off my chest. YES, i am fully aware that I wrote Mello in as a girl. I'll explain it all in my next update. If you don't agree with me, then please don't yell at me about it. I think yaoi ships are just as fantastic as anyone else. That's why I wrote this fangirly smut in the first place.**

**Anyway, that's all you get for now. See you in my next update.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Okay. I said I would explain what happened with Mello, and I'm living up to my promises. No, he/she/it didn't magically switch genders upon leaving the Matrix for the real world. Basically, I've given my genderswapped Mello an entire backstory.**

**Mello has been a tomboy ever since she was a little kid. She always had her hair cut short and acted very rough and boyish and people often mistook her for a boy. Her parents had given her a Romanian boy's name because they liked the meaning of it and figured** that** since it was foreign, no one would really notice. When her parents died (I'm going to throw out a random guess and say she was four or five) she was taken into an orphanage where she was often bullied. She grew to hate the orphanage, so when she found out about Wammy's house, she decided she would leave at any cost. She didn't know Wammy was an orphanage for boys, so when they took her in, mistaking her for a boy, she played it off as a joke. However, once she finally found out, she realized she would have to hide her true identity. Basically, it's a sort of Mulan-type backstory. Mello eventually rose in Wammy's ranks to one of its top students. She had planned to reveal her identity after graduating from Wammy and moving out on her own, but as the series had shown, she left before that could happen. When she arrived in the real world, it was too late to continue hiding who she really was. And let's face it. Mello is really feminine, even as a guy.**

**If you don't like my genderswapping, fine. I figured a lot of people wouldn't. Just keep your opinions to yourself, because honestly I don't really give a damn. I already wrote the story, and I'm not going to rewrite the whole fifteen chapters because you don't like my characters. If you are fine with it, yay! Thanks for liking my fanfiction. Read on.**

More Than Alive- Chapter 3

Outside, the hallway was empty. Mello was long gone. Light poked his head out of the door and looked around. The hall was painted a different color than his room, a soft off-white color, a pale gray linoleum floor, the cool glow of fluorescent lights lighting up the empty corridor. Light stepped out. On one side of him, the hallway came to a dead end, another door across from his, and another at the end of the hall on the wall where the corridor came to an end. In the other direction, the hall extended further down, four more doors on either side, then a staircase, a bright light glowing from the bottom. Wary, Light shut the door and walked down the hallway, his bare feet padding against the cold floor.

Voices sounded the second he reached the staircase. The sound floated up the dark metal spiral stairs. Light stared down as he listened to the conversation.

"So he's awake? Took him long enough."

"How long has it been exactly?"

"Not sure. Around twelve hours or so."

Twelve hours? Light leaned over the railing, waiting to hear more.

"Is he coming down?"

"I don't know. I brought him clothes, like you said. If anything, he's probably at least dressed by now. But I don't know. He seemed pretty frantic."

"It would make sense. Light has no idea where he is."

That voice. Light recognized it instantly. He'd heard it before. He knew it.

"Should I go back for him?"

"No. If you drag him out, that'll only make things worse. Let him go about this on his own."

An awkward silence fell. Light leaned further over the railing, growing impatient. Suddenly his foot slipped on the linoleum. His hands went white, holding the railing in a death grip. He smacked his foot against the banister and felt a sharp stab of pain. Light winced.

"What was that?"

"It's the new arrival."

_Damn it. Now I have no choice._

Light loosened his grip on the railing and padded softly down the stairs. He looked impulsively around him, his vision darting in random directions, like a kitten in a new house. The room at the bottom of the stairs was medium-sized, the walls painted a cool, minty green, the same flooring as the hallway upstairs. There were two large windows, but the world outside was pitch-black and there was nothing to see. There were a few pieces of furniture. A broken-in gray couch was pushed up against one wall, a forest green loveseat against another and a variety of cushions and beanbags were scattered over the floor. A large flatscreen TV was hanging from one wall, a metallic cabinet set into the floor below it. There was a doorway at on the other side of the room, leading into another hallway. It wasn't until Light had studied the entire room that he realized there were people in there with him, their eyes all locked on him.

"Having fun?" He knew that voice. Dark and edgy. Mello. She was stretched out gracefully on a beanbag, her legs tangled with those of the boy sitting across from her. His dark blue eyes were looking up at him from behind a DS console in his hands, hidden behind white-rimmed goggles and a fringe of blood-red hair. The color was completely unnatural, but no matter how Light stared, he couldn't see any roots. He seemed familiar, but Light just couldn't figure out why.

Another boy was sitting on a cushion, his head leaning against the loveseat. His hair was brown, but far darker than Light's had ever been. He was average-sized, with sea-blue eyes. He picked absently the sleeve of his shirt, the design of a frost-white dragon with eyes even bluer than his own painted across his chest. Sitting on the small couch, feet resting next to the boy, was a girl. She looked only a year or so older than Light. She was pale, her skin giving off a strange glow, matching her glimmering silver-gray eyes, which were lined with black, smoky kohl. A small, twilight-blue stud glinted on the left side of her nose, bright against her pale , midnight-blue waves cut into feathery layers fell over her shoulders and spilled onto her fitted black shirt, silver song lyrics scrawled across it in handwritten text. It was almost the same writing that was scrawled over her hands in fading black ink.

Light turned to the couch. There was one more person in the room. As he turned his head to face him, Light's stomach twisted. That guy from before...

He had pale skin, dark gray eyes rimmed by shadows of insomnia, messy raven-black hair scattered around his face. He was wearing his signature long-sleeved white shirt and worn-out jeans, sitting perched on the couch, his knees pulled up to his chest.

Light knew him. But it was impossible. It couldn't be...

"Hello, Light."

"Ryuzaki?"

"Feel free to call me L."

Light took another step into the room. He carefully approached the couch, L's eyes following him with every step he took. He reached out a hand and brushed the worn gray cover, as if unsure if this was a dream or reality. It was soft and gave under the pressure of his fingers. It seemed solid enough. Light looked around at the strangers around him. His eyes landed on back on L. No matter how he tried, he couldn't stop staring. "Ryuzaki... L, you- you're alive."

L gave him a faint, half-hearted smile. "Yes. Yes I am."

Unable to stop himself, Light sat down across from L. His eyes locked onto L's, wide in disbelief. He reached a hand out and leaned forward. L flinched as Light's fingers collided with his shoulder. He stared, held in a trance. "This can't be real."

"Better believe it." A new voice. It was the boy sitting with Mello. He watched Light with curiosity. He turned back to the girl across from him. "He's right in front of him."

"I know, but this is all new to him. He didn't know. Just watch, this is getting good."

Light ignored them. He stayed frozen, staring at L's face, his hand on his shoulder, trying to make himself believe what he was seeing.

"Light. Snap out of it." Another voice, this one cool and musical. The blue-haired girl was speaking, standing behind him now, trying to pull him away from L. Light relaxed, settling back onto the couch.

"Well," L murmured, "That was certainly not the reaction I expected."

Light looked around the room again like a confused kitten. "What happened to me?" He turned back to L. "Where am I? What did you do to me?"

"You're in the real world. Nothing has happened to you, Light. You've simply been set free."

"Set free-" It was like what Mello had told him earlier. It still didn't make any sense. "What do you mean? Where was I before?"

"You'll understand soon enough. Hold still."

Light felt a pair of hands wrap themselves around his head. His vision suddenly went black. Numbers and symbols flashed through his head. Information was rushing into his brain at light speed. Suddenly, everything was there.

_The year is not 2013. It's closer to 2213. No one knows exactly when._

_Centuries ago, there was the invention of AI. Artificial intelligence. It was the greatest advancement in technology in history. Things quickly went bad. AI gained a sense of its own existence. It became sentient and learned to think for itself. Yet humankind still mistreated it, as if these new beings were still the robot slaves they had begun as. It backfired instantly. That was how the war began. Decades of fighting passed. The Earth was destroyed. Synthetic storm clouds were released into the atmosphere to block out the sun, cutting off the AI's largest power source: solar energy. Yet this only made things worse._

_The humans lost. The world became imprisoned in a virtual reality. It was called the Matrix._

_The Matrix is a simulated dream meant to be an exact replica of the Earth as it was before the AI war, from its invention in 1999 until the takeover of 2020, then back again. Time doesn't pass, only moves in cycles, the same 21 years over and over. Meanwhile, in the real world, humans are lying, comatose, in cells, trapped in a permanent dream. They are grown from harvested DNA and spend their entire lives in this embryonic state. When humans die, genes are taken from selected humans and spliced together to create a replacement. Humans are no longer born. They are made._

_The AIs keep us in these cells, hooked up to wires, to use us as a power source. They take power from the electricity generated by our brains and body heat. To them, we are nothing but a power source. Batteries. That's the only reason why they kept us alive._

_The war ended about 60 years ago. Since then, a peace has fallen between the AIs and humanity in the real world. But they still need our energy. The storm clouds are still there. There is no longer any fighting out here, but the conflict inside the Matrix never ended. The AIs are still strong there. They exist in the form of programs. They are not human. Some are on our side. But many of them aren't. They still hate humankind. And they are still out for revenge._

_And you, Light Yagami, will somehow, some way, find a way to accept this._

Light gasped as he felt the hands pull away. His head was pounding. He collapsed against the couch. "Oh my god. Oh my god. What is this. This can't be real. This can't..."

"Alright. If that's how it's going to be, maybe we need to go over this again." The hands brushed against his scalp. Light shivered.

"Matt, that's enough." L's voice.

Light squeezed his eyes shut and pressed the palms of his hands against his forehead. "What.. the hell... did I just see?"

"Everything that you needed to. Are your questions answered?"

"Y-yes, most of them- b-but..." Light stuttered, grasping for words. "I- I still... I don't know." He opened his eyes and removed his hands. He looked over his shoulder. The red-haired boy was standing behind him, his curiosity replaced by offbeat annoyance. Light turned back toward L. "So this... is the real world?"

L nodded. "Yes."

"And the world I lived in before- that was the Matrix? The virtual reality?"

"Yes. Programmed by AIs to hold humankind prisoner."

"So... how did I get here?"

"Because of the pill you took," said a voice behind him. _Matt, I guess._ "It appeared as a normal pill to you, but it was actually a temporary virus. It severed the connection between your mind and the Matrix. This way, after your avatar was taken down, your mind returned to your real body instead of dying along with your avatar."

"So that's why you wanted me to take the black pill."

"Yes. Otherwise, you'd be dead." The boy sitting by the loveseat finally spoke up.

Light looked down at the floor, sorting through more questions. He couldn't manage to put his chaotic thoughts into words. "This... this just doesn't make sense."

"Of course it doesn't," Mello said. "Up until yesterday, you'd never even known we existed. But, well... here you are."

Light spun around to face her. "But why? Why am I here? Why did any of you bother setting me free?"

Silence. No one could answer. "Light..." L murmured.

Light looked back toward him. "And you. You shouldn't be here. You should be dead."

"But I'm not dead. It was the pill, Light. That's how-"

"No." The words came bursting out before Light could stop them. "That's impossible. None... None of this is real. It can't be."

"Shit," Matt whispered, backing away from Light. "Here we go."

"I'm dreaming," Light said, his fingers digging viciously into the fabric of the couch. "That's all this is. Some weird, fucked-up hallucinatory fever dream. Any second now, I'm going to wake up. In a hospital. My apartment. Somewhere." _Anywhere but here._

L reached out to Light, trying to hold him back. "Light, calm down-"

"No!" Light swatted L's hand away and jumped to his feet. "No, I will not calm down! I'm not going to play your games, L." He backed away form him, inching his way back to the stairs.

L stood up and took a step toward him. "Light, just let us explain-"

"Shut up!" Light screamed, the panic finally setting in. "Shut up! Y- you... Stay away from me. All of you, just leave me alone!"

Without another word, Light turned and dashed back up the stairs.

0o0o0o0o0

Light slammed the door of the small room he had woken up in. He collapsed onto the bed, head in his hands. _Where am I? What happened to me? What... What have I done?_

_This is all just a dream. That's all it is. Wake up, Light. You have to wake up..._

There was a soft knock at the door. Light looked past his fingers toward it. He stared, refusing to move. The knock sounded again. Without waiting for a response, the door opened.

It was L. He was standing outside, one hand holding the door open, looking shyly inside, as if he were afraid to come any closer. "Light? Are you okay?"

Light tensed up. He crouched on the bed, back arched, fingers clawed, taking on a defensive stance. "Go away," he growled. "Get away from me or I- I'll kill you."

"That seems to be a common threat from you, isn't it?" L opened the door and slipped inside, shutting it behind him.

Light stared at him, pulse racing. "What do you want from me?"

L slowly approached Light, sitting down across from him on the bed. "All I want is for you to accept the truth. You're here now. This is real, Light. No matter what you think, this is your world now."

"B- but... I don't understand. Why am I here?"

"You are here because you chose to. The pill was simply a request. You weren't forced into anything, remember? The message I sent was only a way to tell you what was meant to be."

Light couldn't speak. He stared at L, his dark grey eyes holding him in a trance. "L... Ryuzaki... You shouldn't be alive. I-"

"I understand, Light. It's been a long time."

"But... I was there. I watched you die. You stopped breathing. Your pulse stopped, you just went limp. I remember everything. This is impossible. I-_ I killed you myself!_"

Light's hand flew up to cover his mouth._ Did I... really just say that?_

L's face stayed blank. No shock, no anger, nothing. He simply stayed there, staring at Light, as if nothing had happened. L placed his hand on Light's shoulder, holding his gaze.

"I know."


	4. Chapter 4

**Sorry for the week-long cliffhanger there. I was away for a while and couldn't make any updates. but I'm back now!**

**Basically, no feedback about Mello's ouran-host-club-style dilemma. (if you don't understand that, go back to read my author's note in chapter 3). I guess no reviews are good reviews. Really. I don't want to hear from any trolls unless they are grey and have horns.**

**I need to shut up now so you can read my story. Onward.**

More Than Alive- Chapter 4

Light fell silent. He couldn't breathe, couldn't speak, nothing. L kept his eyes on him, waiting for a response. Light finally managed to choke out a single word. "What?"

"I already know, Light. I know you are- were- Kira."

"But... how?" Light whispered. He looked away, head reeling. "You- you cleared my name. After I turned myself in. Then... After that, after Higuchi was caught, I thought... I don't understand."

"Light, I had found out that you were Kira for a long time before then," L said. "And I knew that you would try and kill me to keep from being caught. But there was no way to prove it to the rest of the task force. None of them would believe me, especially not your father. If I let you kill me, that was the only way that I could ever prove you guilty."

"So you had known all this time and you didn't just turn me in?"

"Like I said. No one would have believed me. I was already in their suspicions, and they had too much faith in you, Light. If I were dead to that world, my successor would have enough evidence to find my killer. And it was Near who exposed you as Kira, right?"

"Yes, but..." One last thing was still unanswered. Light turned back to L. "How did you end up here?"

L laughed softly. "Think of it like this, Light. If L, allegedly the world's greatest detective, could solve even the most obscure of cases, wouldn't I be able to decipher that I was living in a virtual world?

Since I was young, I always knew that something was wrong with the world. Everything seemed so- I don't know, dreamlike, systematic, something like that. I never minded much, I could manage to live a seemingly normal life and keep my thoughts to myself. But then..."

L trailed off, sighing deeply. "After my parents died, everything changed. Suddenly it seemed like nothing was real. I felt as if I were walking in a dream. Naturally, I started researching in the little spare time that I had after being accepted into Wammy, trying to figure out the source of this feeling. But no matter what I found, nothing fit the description of what went through my head.

I was around twelve when it happened. I had given up my search. Then one night, I was alone, as usual, just wasting time on the internet with my laptop. Then it just crashed. Everything went black, then a message scrolled onto the screen. _Wake up, Ryuzaki Lawliet._

Then everything was back to normal, just like that. I had no idea where it had come from, so I tried to investigate. I ran a status check through my computer, but I couldn't find any anomaly that would explain the message. Then I opened my email, and someone had sent me a blank message. I couldn't read the return address. It was just an endless line of random characters that I couldn't read. So I sent back a message, asking who this stranger was. After that, I didn't get a response, so I just forgot about it.

Months later my computer spontaneously crashed again. The hacker had finally responded. He said his name was Rowan, that he lived in another world, and that I knew something that others didn't. Of course, I had no idea what he was talking about, but I felt that he could help me somehow. So I kept talking with Rowan. I kept his message saved in my email, so I could contact him If I needed. Over the next few months, we kept up the system. It was like having a chat room buddy, in a sort of convoluted, science-fiction sense.

One night, Rowan sent me a message. He told me that we couldn't talk for very much longer. He wouldn't tell me why. But he said it was time for me to know the truth. He told me everything I know now. All the information that Matt had downloaded into your memory, Rowan sent me in that message. And after that, I never heard from him again.

Years passed. Not a word from Rowan. The feeling was still there. It never left. I could never bring myself to believe what Rowan had told me, but something in me knew that it was true.

I was almost twenty when it happened again. I had graduated from Wammy years earlier. I had become L. When my computer crashed, I panicked at first, but then I remembered. It turned out that it was true. Rowan was back.

Shortly afterwards, I picked up the Kira case. I told Rowan everything I knew. Whoever he was, I figured he may be able to help me. Then a year later, a few days before everything ended, I told Rowan what I had found. I said that I knew you were Kira, but I knew that I would have to die to prove it.. There was no other solution. That was when Rowan sent me the black pill. He told me that I would know what to do. Then... You know what happened after that."

Silence fell. Light's head was spinning, trying to take in everything L had just told him. _So that was your story. And your name is really Ryuzaki. Ryuzaki Lawliet._

"So this... Rowan... who was he?"

"He was my mentor," L said. "A hacker and the captain of the Tempest, the hovership that we are on now. He was with me pretty much all through my journey here."

"Where is he now?"

"Um..." L bit his lip and looked at the floor. "Rowan is dead. He was... He was killed by programs on one of our missions two years ago."

Light's heart thudded in his chest. "Oh. I- I didn't know. I'm sorry."

"No, no, it's fine. It was a long time ago. Ever and I have taken over for him since then." No matter how he tried to hide it, there was an odd catch in his voice as he spoke.

_So he does have feelings. I'd never really thought about it, but now..._

Light thought back to the life he'd lived before, in the virtual dream world he used to call reality. For six years, he'd been killing people, trying to clear the world of crime. A world that didn't even really exist. But what had it all been for? In the end, it had all been for nothing. The world was no different than it had been before. He had failed. All those lives he'd taken were nothing but a waste. All he'd done was become a killer.

_You're a murderer, Light. A monster. You should be dead._

Light's throat burned. He coughed, cleared his head and looked toward L. "There's one last thing."

L turned to face him. "What is it?"

"Why am I here, L?" he asked, gaze once again fixed on L."Why did you bother saving me?"

"Simple, Light," he answered. "I know who you really are. Your intentions for becoming Kira were truly good, even though you allowed your power to take control of you. I believe that somewhere, that good is still there. You can help us."

Light couldn't respond. His vision drifted off into the distance, leaving him staring into space. "Oh."

Light's eyes stung. His breathing felt choked, his throat constricting for some unknown reason._ Is that what you really think of me, L?_

He was not a vigilante. He was not justice. He was just a murderer, someone who had killed thousands of helpless victims to enforce his own selfish beliefs, trying to save a world that was nothing but an illusion. He didn't deserve to be alive. L shouldn't have saved him. He should have just let him die.

Light choked, pushing back a remorseful scream. He hated himself. He couldn't do this...

"Do you need a moment?"

L was still there. He'd completely forgotten. _Damn it. I can't cry in front of him._

"Um- yeah, if I could just- be alone for a bit..."

"Okay. Come back to the common room when you feel up to it."

"O- okay."

Light watched as L turned and slipped out the door. The second he was gone, Light snatched a pillow off the bed, buried his face in it and screamed, tears falling and soaking into the soft fabric.

_Why? Why, L? Why did you save me?_

0o0o0o0o0

It was a while before Light felt that he could leave the room again. He'd spent at least five minutes lying there, getting rid of every emotion that he'd been holding back since he'd woken up. He spent even longer cleaning himself up, trying his hardest to make it look as if nothing had happened. Once the swelling in his eyes had cleared up, he left for the room downstairs.

"You're sure he's okay?"

"Yeah, he's been gone for a while."

"He'll be back soon enough. He said he needed to be alone for a while."

"Is a while long enough to kill yourself?"

"Shut up, Rinn."

The familiar voices sounded from the common room at the bottom of the spiral staircase. By the time Light entered, everyone was still in the room, exactly as he had found them the first time. It couldn't have been too long if they were still here. L looked towards him from his place on the couch. "Better?"

"Yes," Light answered flatly. He stood at the bottom of the stairs, keeping his distance. "So..." He couldn't remember where they had left off before he had stormed out.

"You wanted to know why you were here?" began the girl on the loveseat. _Ever, I guess._

"I explained to him while we were upstairs," L said. "I think he understands now."

"So he knows what he can do for us?" the dark-haired boy asked. _Rinn?_

"I hope so, Rinn." _So that is your name._

Light looked around at the people in the room. "So where do we go from here?"

"Oh, right." L stood up and walked over to him. "I don't think you ever got a proper introduction. Welcome to the Tempest, class 4 hovership, gen 7. I'd assume you know some of us. I'm not sure you would recognize Matt. Mello, you might not remember as she is. The girl is Ever. She captains the ship. The guy next to her? That's Rinn. He's the operator."

"Operator?"

"He's a wild human. A natural-born. He can't jack in like the rest of us, so he runs operations out here and keeps things in check."

Light took a closer look at Rinn. He studied his arms, left exposed by the short sleeves of his shirt. He couldn't find any trace of the sockets that were buried in the flesh of his own arms. "That's still possible?"

"Of course it is. Do you think that free humans wouldn't bother with continuation of species?"

"So there are others out here?"

"Yes, there are," Matt cut in. "Thousands, actually. And a lot of them are like Rinn."

"They live in the underground city." Mello chimed in. "It's called Haven. It's where all of us are from, at this point. It's the third city built in the real world after the war ended."

Light nodded. "Alright. I get it now."

"There are also other hovership crews," Ever said. "Since there are really no threats from the machine city since the war is over, all we really do is keep tabs on everything going on in the virtual world. We're still going on with the project of freeing humanity, but it's not nearly so desperate now."

"So since I'm here," Light wondered out loud, "I guess this means that I'm part of your crew now, doesn't it?"

"If you choose that," L answered. "I think that you'd make a good hacker. You're definitely strong-minded enough to be a fighter as well."

"It comes with a lot of drawbacks, though," Rinn said, cutting L short. "We do a lot of dangerous work, and you'll spend about half your life stuck on a hovership with the same people for weeks on end. It takes a kind of, I don't know, special person to deal with that." He cast a vicious glance toward Mello, grinning.

"Rinn, you're a freak," she mumbled cynically.

"Honestly, I... I don't know," Light stammered. "I don't really have anything going for me here. And... I was already running a risk when I was in the Matrix. Becoming Kira didn't end as I'd hoped but this time..." He stopped. Everything fell into place. Light looked up to face the rest of the crew. "This time it'll be different. I'm in."

A surprised murmur of approval swept throughout the room. L gave Light his signature faint smile. "I was hoping you'd say yes. Welcome to the Tempest, Light."

"If he's joining us, he'll need an alias," Ever said, crossing her arms and smiling.

"I'm way ahead of you," Light responded. He remembered that first day, picking up the notebook, the strange empowering feeling that went through him. It was here now, only a different kind of power. "You know who I am- who I was, really. So... why would I waste a perfectly good name that's right in front of me?"

"What do you mean?" Matt asked.

"I'll keep the name that my followers in that world gave me. My new alias will be Kira."

"You sure that won't set off the police?"

"They already know that Kira has been found. They know it was me. The Kira case has been closed. It's a perfectly open alias. And it was already mine in the first place."

L nodded. "Good point. Light- Kira- You've been initiated."

Light smiled. _The past... That world... It's all behind me now. The new Kira is taking over. I'm going to save the world. For real, this time._


	5. Chapter 5

**Okay, before I start, I just wanted to say that i'm going to try and hold off from updating for a little while. Barely anyone has read this, so I'm just going to wait for maybe a week or so before I post another chapter. If there is anyone who is following this story, No, I haven't stopped writing, I finished the story long before I posted the first chapter, now I'm editing as I go. So no, I'm not one of those writers who starts a story, gets bored and quits halfway through. Just letting you know. **

**Okay, now that that's overwith, back to the important stuff.**

More Than Alive- Chapter 5

Light was lying in a chair, staring at the ceiling, waiting. Three days had passed since his arrival in the real world and his initiation into the crew of the Tempest. They'd told him everything he had asked. In a few short days, he'd crammed all the information about the ship and its mechanics into his memory.

The hovership ran on stored electricity gathered from geothermal energy, which is generated in the city, and traveled using magnetic hoverstruts. The crew had the ability to enter and exit the Matrix at will, thanks to the plugs that remained from their time in the Matrix. All of them had the sockets, except for Rinn, of course. He kept track of their activity and monitored everything from the ship while the others were jacked in. He was a fast code-reader and could decipher the vague, basic shapes projected onto the holodeck's giant HD-touch-screen computer monitor from the crew's minds. The ship traveled just below the machine city, keeping within range of the wireless signal given off by the Matrix, allowing them to grab a connection and jack into the dream world. The crew's minds, while jacked into the Matrix, are completely connected, their bodies in the real world remaining in a "sleep" state until their minds return. If the connection is severed, the brain shuts down and whoever's plug has been pulled dies. Dying in the Matrix causes a similar effect, cutting the body off from the mind. The reason is... um... is...

_Damn it. I can't remember._

Light rolled over to look towards the control panel. It glowed with energy, its collection of buttons, switches, gages, and other things running full tilt. Mello was sitting in one of the swivel chairs positioned in front of the massive screen, flipping through the controls, oblivious to Light's stares. Light ran a hand over the back of his head, his fingers brushing through his short, spiky brown hair. It was growing back surprisingly fast.

"So... when are we starting this again?"

"In a minute. Keep your pants on. Seriously."

Light rolled onto his back again. His training was supposed to begin today. From what had been explained to him, he had a lot to learn. Matrix resistance members were assassins in the virtual world. They were fast, skilled, and deadly. And he was supposed to become one of them._ I wonder how long this is going to take._

A chime from the computer made Light turn over again. A window was open on the screen, black and green streams of code racing downwards at lightning speed. Mello spun around to face him. "Alright, looks like we're all keyed up. Let's get this started."

She walked over to him and switched on one of the screens hanging over the circle of chairs. The monitor blinked to life. Mello took a handful of wires with clips at the end of each. She attached each to what looked like a small suction cup, peeling some kind of backing off like a sticker.

"What are those?" Light asked, focus darting between the monitor and wires.

"Adhesive patches. They keep the monitors stuck in place while you're jacked in." She made quick work of sticking each monitor in its place. With each addition, a new line appeared on the glowing screen. When the final monitor was stuck in place, a small blip came from the screen. The last line appeared, following a steady jagged pattern. "Okay. Got your pulse. Now that's covered..."

She reached behind the chair's headrest. Light felt something cold and hard jab into the back of his neck. He jerked his head forward. "What are you doing?"

Mello pushed Light back onto the headrest. "Plugging you in. Now hold still. You wouldn't want me to miss."

Light tried his best not to move as Mello moved back behind the chair and plugged the jack into its socket at the back of his head. As soon as the thing was in place, Light's scalp began to burn. Electricity pulsed through the jack, setting off fireworks in his brain. Light bit back a scream and squirmed, gasping for air and trying to relax. It didn't stop. He bit his tongue until he tasted blood, desperate not to cry out in pain.

"Relax, Light." He felt Mello's hands on his shoulders. She leaned over him, honey-blonde fringe framing her face. "It always hurts the first time you get jacked in. Just hold on. It'll go away eventually." She returned to the control panel and opened a new window, flipping through a menu of options titled with strings of symbols Light didn't recognize. "Let's see... starter programs, memory filler, search stream, bluh bluh bluh, boring... oh, here we go." She tapped one of the options. It grew to fill the entire window, the others disappearing. New icons appeared. "So, Kira-kun, what do you want to learn first? Kung fu? Tae kwon do? Oh, wait this one's fun..." She pressed on one of the icons. "How's jiu jitsu sound?"

"Jiu jitsu?" Light blurted out, startled. "I'm taking an entire course of jiu jitsu in a day?"

"Not exactly. You're learning the art of jiu jitsu inside and out in about two minutes."

"Wait- what?" Before Light could say more, the jack pulsed again. Light had only a second to let out a scream before everything went dark. He as if he were falling, head spinning as an entirely new load of information downloaded into his memory. Suddenly, he was back. His eyes flew open, and it was over almost as soon as it had started. Light stared at the ceiling. He heard the blips of the heart monitor speed up. "Whoa."

"Oh, I see. I think he likes it." Mello's voice. She laughed and turned around to face him.

Light's mind was reeling. He felt as if he were high, the new fighting knowledge settling in. Most of all, the pain in his head was gone. He turned toward Mello. "What was that?"

"It was your first lesson. Trust me, you're going to be learning a lot. Let me know when you're ready to go again, and I'll set up the next download."

Light took a second to catch his breath. "Okay. I'm ready."

"Okay, let's see what's next." The world went black again.

It went on for the next few hours. Mello watched the codes rush by on the monitor as Light lay still in his jack chair, information flowing into his brain, his heart racing to keep up.

Light's eyes opened again. The world slowly came back into focus.

"Hey. Light. You okay?" Matt's voice.

"Matt?" Light tried to sit up, but the plug in the back of his head held him back. Matt was sitting on the jack chair next to Light's, looking down at him curiously. The rest of the crew was there as well, scattered throughout the room. "Whoa. How long have I been-"

"Around three hours, I'd say." Light heard L's voice from somewhere behind him. He turned his head toward the sound. L was leaning over him, perched on the jack chair on his opposite side. "How are you feeling?"

"I- I don't know," he murmured. "Good, I guess? I-" Light's eyes flickered. "I know kung fu."

"He's been doing really well," Mello said, watching the monitor as the code streams slowed. "I've downloaded almost the entire set, and he's just been sitting here through all of it."

"Really?" Ever asked, examining the downloaded courses. "Wow. That's really good for a newbie."

L nodded. "I think he's ready for us to find out exactly how good he is."

Light turned towards him, confused. "What?"

Before he could ask any more questions, L was lying in the chair next to his, sticking monitors onto himself. Lines of his pulse, breathing, blood pressure and brain waves appeared on the monitor above him. He relaxed into the chair. "Mello, set up arena 3 in the construct."

She turned back to the computer. "On it."

"What are we doing?" Light asked. No one had answered him yet, and the curiosity still buzzed around inside his head.

"Testing you," L answered, looking up at the ceiling as Ever stood behind him and slid the chair's jack into the socket in L's head. His eyes widened. L's body convulsed once, then his eyes fell closed and he went limp.

Light stared at him, stunned. "Is he- is he okay?"

"He's fine," Rinn said, sitting a swivel chair at the control panel. "That's just what you do when you jack in. Your body gets confused, freaks out for a second, then you relax."

"You were doing that five minutes ago, and you were even worse," Mello added.

Light rested his head back down, waiting for the world to go black again. He heard Rinn's voice. "Alright, you're going in, right about... Now."

The fireworks were back. Jolts of electricity fired through him, frying his nerves. Light cried out in pain, then suddenly everything was dark. His eyes closed and he went numb.

0o0o0o0o0

The first thing Light felt was solid ground under his feet. The air around him was cool and smelled like sandalwood. Light opened his eyes. A golden light flooded his vision, then everything became clear. He was in a large, empty room that looked like a yoga studio. He took in the polished wood floor, bamboo-patterned walls, and mats laid out along the walls. A thin trail of smoke from an incense burner floated through the room, explaining the sandalwood smell. And there, standing right in front of him wearing a white gi tied with a black belt, was L.

"Enjoying the scenery, Kira?"

Light looked down at himself. He was wearing a gi as well, only his was black and the belt tied tightly at his waist was white. He tugged back the sleeve of his shirt to look at his forearm. The plug that was normally embedded in his skin had disappeared. He checked his other arm, then put a hand to the back of his head. At the nape of his neck, where his fingers would normally collide with a metal plug, he found nothing but smooth skin. "The plugs are gone."

"I thought you'd notice," L said. "It's a trick of the digital world. As long as you're here or in the Matrix, those plugs don't exist."

Light looked back up at him. "So why are we here?" he asked.

"Simple, Kira-kun," L responded. He quickly slipped into a defensive stance. "I want to know exactly how much you've learned."

Light responded fast. "Well. I wouldn't be worried. We've done this before." His mind snapped into focus, his feet moved to balance him, fingers clawed, muscles tensed and prepared to spring.

A second passed, tension thick in the air, suspense and adrenaline pulsing through Light, waiting for the first move. A microscopic twitch passed through L, then his feet shifted and he rushed forward. Light quickly switched positions to fend off the attack. L spun sideways, aiming a for a kick at Light's head. He quickly dodged the blow and ducked, arm tensed to strike L in the chest. L caught his fist before it hit its mark, then grabbed Light by the elbow, promptly flipping him over onto the floor.

In seconds Light had rolled away from L and was back on his feet. He jumped toward his opponent, arms outstretched to bring him down. L turned and dodged Light's attack, grabbing him by the ankle in the process and pulling him off balance. In the confusion, Light was left an open target, allowing L to strike a well-placed kick in his stomach, sending him flying backwards into the wall. Light slammed into the wall and lost his breath. Gasping, he jumped to his feet, grasping to get his senses back. He narrowly avoided a retaliation strike from L and stepped back out to the center of the room.

L turned around and sped toward Light, keeping low to the ground. He spun around and lashed out, aiming another kick straight at Light's chest. He ducked backwards and caught L's foot, flipping him over onto his stomach. L caught himself on his hands and spun back around, twisting his leg out of Light's grasp. He feinted a blow at Light's chest, then went for his head instead. Light blocked him, but L suddenly switched directions and struck him with another powerful kick. Light went flying and smacked into the wall behind him. His skull slammed against the bamboo. His vision went gray and the taste of blood flooded his mouth. Light fell to the floor, standing unsteadily on his hands and knees, gasping for air.

"Now," L said. "What is wrong with this picture?"

"You- you're better than me at this," Light coughed, taking in huge gulps of air. "I'm losing too easily."

"Right. Do you know why that is, Light?"

"Y-you're... too fast for me."

"Listen to me, Light." Light raised his head to look at L, his blurry vision falling in and out of focus. "Do you think that what we're doing here would have anything to do with my strength or speed in the real world?"

Light couldn't answer, only stared at L, gasping.

"Do you really think that's air you're breathing?"

His words rushed through Light's head, repeating themselves. Synapses fired in his brain, setting something off. Suddenly everything made sense. Light gritted his teeth and pushed himself off the ground. He staggered to his feet, glaring a challenge at L.

His opponent grinned. "Back for more?" he laughed, once again taking a fighting stance.

Light closed his eyes for a second and breathed. He focused the energy of his mind into his avatar, feeling the space around him, his feet in contact with the ground, the air against his skin. Exhaling, he opened his eyes. L was still there, waiting. Light knew what he had to do. He snapped back into his fighting stance, then he attacked.

The world around Light blurred as he rushed forward toward L. He watched as L crossed his arms in front of him to fend off Light's attack. Suddenly he switched directions, sliding behind L's back and catching him in the side with a forceful kick. L slid sideways and skidded across the floor, balancing himself with one arm to stop from falling. He turned back to face Light, who was already moving in for another strike. The two became a flurry of motion, moving at lightning speed, fighting, striking at each other with almost supernatural power.

L ducked away from Light's fist for what seemed like the hundredth time and slipped sideways, attempting to catch Light off guard. Light noticed almost instantly and turned, only to be narrowly missed by L's foot aimed at the side of his head. Light pushed his strike aside, clenched his hand into a fist and pulled back, preparing to throw yet another punch. L tensed, already waiting for Light to miss him again. Suddenly L felt a sharp pain in his chest. His eyes darted down to see Light's hand buried in the fabric of his shirt, but only for a second before the force of the blow knocked him backwards. He felt another strike in his stomach, then another in his chest, sending him flying. He smacked against the wall and slid to rest on the floor, gasping in pain. He felt hands on his arms pressing him against the wall, pinning him back. He looked up to see Light's face just inches from his, breathing heavily, a drop of sweat sliding down his face.

L finally caught his breath. "If this were real combat, I'd expect you to kill me right about now."

0o0o0o0o0

It was an average morning. The crew was gathered in the dining hall for breakfast, trading casual conversation and inside jokes, none of which Light understood. He laughed along awkwardly, wondering when he'd be able to cut in. His mind went back to the day before, his combat with L. He wondered if he'd ever had to go through that again. The first fight had been hell as it was.

"Hey, Light. You there?" Rinn's voice cut through Light's thoughts.

Light looked up. "Hm?"

"You're kind of spacey today," Ever said. "Something wrong?"

"No," he said, turning back to the reheated plate of toast in front of him. Just about all of the food on the ship was either frozen or reconstituted to survive the weeks between visits back to the city to restock. "Just thinking about a lot of stuff."

"Like what kind of stuff?" Mello asked.

_Well, your whole gender-bending stunt, for one._

He felt a hand on his back. "Well, one thing is that he want's to know why you're a girl all of a sudden," Matt's voice sounded from behind him.

Light spun around. "What the hell?"

Matt grinned and held up the hand that had touched him. "Sorry. It's my special ability. I can read or inject thoughts through physical contact. You know what they say. Use it or lose it."

"Oh, that." Mello laughed. "Long story. It's no big deal."

"That wasn't it!" Light retorted, bristling. "It was something else. I- it's complicated."

"You're wondering about the work we do in the Matrix?" L had finally spoken up. He watched Light from across the table, his gaze curious. "What exactly the combat lessons were for?"

"Well," Light murmured, unsure of his thoughts, "That's most of it, I guess."

"The virtual world is a dangerous place for people like us," Ever began, turning to face Light. "Most of the programs in the Matrix are still in the mindset that existed during the war. They want humanity to remain imprisoned so they can keep control over our kind. They know that we're trying to undo that."

"We have to be master fighters," Mello said. "These programs are a part of the dream and are allowed to do almost anything they want. In order to stay matched, we have to be unnaturally good at what we do. Otherwise we'd never survive even a minute there."

Light nodded. "That explains a lot."

"You're a very good fighter, Light." L cut in out of nowhere.

"What?"

"When I was fighting you yesterday, you showed a sort of strength and determination that I have never seen before in someone so new. I think you may be ready for your first mission soon."

Light choked. "How soon do you mean?"

"Three days," L said, flashing his faint, mysterious smile. "Three days, and then we'll see."


	6. Chapter 6

**Well, I'm back. If anyone bothered noticing, it's been a while since my last update. Still waiting for more views. I haven't even hit 50 yet. I don't want to be posting a story that no one's going to read, but meh. I'm bored, and I don't want to leave the few followers I have hanging. Besides, i like posting. I'm not doing this for publicity. Like this crap would ever go viral, anyway.**

**AAAAAANYWAY back to the story. Onward.**

More Than Alive- Chapter 6

_You're ready, Light. I've been thinking about this for a while now. You've gotten the entire repertoire of combat courses downloaded, and you have mastered them incredibly fast. With all your questions, it seems that at this point you know everything about the virtual world that we do. Listen. I want you to join us in our next mission into the Matrix. Don't be like that. I know you're ready to do this, trust me._

_The crew of the Tempest is still incomplete. There's one last person who I want to join us. I'd think that you can guess who it is. Yes, right. I've been trying to contact him for weeks, but it seems that I can't get through. We're going to have to get a message to him from the inside. I want you to come with us. Yes, I really do think you're ready. I only hope that Near and Mello don't kill each other the minute he is set free._

L's words from the previous day echoed over and over in Light's head as he lay on the couch of the common room, drifting in daydreams. He had no idea what he'd have to do. He didn't know what to expect. What exactly was the point of this mission anyway?

So L was freeing Near now. How many people had he broken out in the last few weeks? First Matt and Mello, then him, now he was dragging Near, little 15-year-old Near, into this mess. Maybe he didn't want to go. Maybe he didn't want anything to do this. Maybe...

"Light."

The sound of his name violently derailed Light's train of thought, sending it crashing into the abyss. He sat up and turned toward the doorway into the main hallway. Ever was standing there, leaning casually against the wall, twirling a long midnight-blue strand of hair through her ink-stained fingers. Her nose stud had been changed to a tiny black star. "We're jacking in. Come on."

Light jumped up off the couch to follow her as she turned and walked back to the holodeck. He ran a hand through his own hair, which was remarkably back to its original length. He had no idea why it had grown so fast, or why it had suddenly stopped. He forgot all about it as he entered the room, instead listening to L's briefing of the mission.

"Alright, the plan goes something like this. Once we jack in, we'll be in Tokyo at the Otemachi Station. It'll be busy enough there for us to slip in and out without anyone noticing. Near is currently in the area working on a case of disappearances, which I suspect will soon be solved. Rinn's been looking into it, and currently he should be at the Tokyo Technological Institute picking up information on a suspect. We infiltrate the building, intercept the delivery and slip him a message along with the files. Once that's done, we slip out as fast as we can and it'll be over and done with."

A murmur of agreement traveled through the room. Light jacked in, pulse racing, waiting to see the dream world again.

0o0o0o0o0

Light's eyes flickered open. A blast of loud noise pounded against his ears. The screech of train wheels, miscellaneous chatter and a sweep of hot air immediately told him where he was. The Otemachi subway station was as busy as ever. The world felt exactly the same as it had been before he'd left. No, not exactly. Even better. Light felt different. His vision was clearer than it had ever been, every noise played through his head in surround-sound, as if everything he could possibly sense had been amplified a thousand times over.

No one seemed to have noticed the stranger who had just appeared out of thin air inside a glass phone booth. Light pressed a hand against the pane in front of him, sliding the booth's door open. A hand reached out from the crowd and grabbed him by the arm.

"Raito! I've been looking everywhere for you!"

It was Mello. She was mixed in with the crowd, trying to blend in, but Light couldn't miss her. She wore dark wayfarer shades and was dressed all in black, with sleek, tightly-laced combat boots, skin-tight jeans with a metallic belt, and a black top covered by a leather jacket. She tugged his arm again. "Come on. The convention is starting. I don't want to be late again."

Convention? Oh. We're cosplayers then.

"Oh, sorry. I just had to call Rena. She said she'd be here soon," he said, playing along. Light let Mello drag him through the crowd and out of the subway exit. Standing outside in the cold night air was the rest of the crew. L, Ever and Matt were all wearing outfits similar to Mello's. Matt wore his own custom boots, fingerless leather gloves and a vest with striped sleeves instead of a leather jacket. His jeans weren't anywhere near as tight as Mello's. Ember wore silver-rimmed shield sunglasses, strappy combat boots, skinny jeans and a cami underneath a windbreaker that was cropped just below her ribs. And L... Light had never seen him look more dangerous. He was somewhere between an undercover ninja and a serial killer. Most of his outfit was covered by a black trench coat that fell almost to his knees. Underneath was an ordinary black tee and his signature broken-in jeans, along with custom sneakers and sunglasses, as if the entire outfit were tailor-made for him.

"Enjoying the view?" Matt's voice cut through his thoughts. "You didn't even check out your own new clothes. Man, you are really easily impressed."

"My new- what?" Light looked down at himself. He had his own custom-made black ensemble as well. Straight-leg jeans, combat boots similar to Matt's, a black tee and blazer covered his avatar. He felt two objects in the weighing down the jacket's pockets. In one was some kind of small black smartphone-like device. The other held a pair of steel-and-black aviators. The jacket still carried something in its pockets. A quick search revealed two pockets in the lining of the jacket, which held two fully loaded pistols."Wow. Are these what we- ?"

"Yes. These clothes are what we normally wear when we jack in." It was L who had answered him. "They're our default outfits unless otherwise specified. Mello and Matt took the liberty of picking yours out for you. If you'd like something different, then-"

"No, no," Light said, slipping the aviators on. "It's fine. I like it, really." Instead of making his view of the virtual world dimmer against the glare of the Tokyo lights, they didn't change his vision at all. If anything, they made everything appear even more clearly than before.

Ever twitched, eager to get the mission started. "Come on, guys. Light, we can't just stand here watching you admire everything. We've got to get this started." She tugged him by the sleeve of his jacket and he shook away his amazement, starting off with the rest of the crew in the direction of the Tokyo Institute.

The first part of the mission was easy. The security at the entrance of the library and research center was very weak. Light managed to sneak past with the two guns hidden in the pockets in the lining of his jacket. Matt made rounds of observing the main entrance, waiting for Near to show. Light followed the others into the research center. The inside was huge. The walls were lined with hundreds of bookshelves, modernized staircases crisscrossing the room, leading from the second-level balcony to the main floor below, where rows of computers were stationed. Ever made her way down to the computers, knowing that Near wouldn't recognize her out of the rest of the crew. She would be keeping tabs on the student files that Near would be looking up as suspects. L, Light and Mello continued on through the center to a locked door at the very back, a keypad set into the wall beside it. Mello removed one of the smartphone-gadgets from a pocket in her jacket and scanned the keypad. A code flashed onto the screen of the device. Mello punched the numbers into the keypad and the doors swung open. They went on into the restricted area.

An empty hallway stretched out before them, either side lined with doors. Mello walked down the hallway ahead of L and Light, staring at her phone.

"It should be somewhere around here... Oh. Here it is." She abruptly turned right and pushed open a conveniently unlocked office door. A black nameplate hung on the polished fake oak.

Ari Tanaka, Dean of Students

"We're breaking into the dean's office?" Light pondered out loud.

"This is the only place that we'll have access to all the information about every student in the university," L answered. He pushed aside a swivel chair in front of an expensive-looking metal desk. He switched on the computer sitting on it as Mello slipped past Light and shut the door, locking it behind them.

The three of them waited as the dean's computer booted up, waiting for a signal from Matt or Ever. Minutes passed, then L's phone rang. He picked it up. "Matt. What do you see out there?"

"Near's entered the building. I'll be alerting Ever next. Have you tapped into the student files?"

"I'm on it," Mello answered. "Hold on. It requires a password." She slipped her phone out from her pocket and did a quick scan of the password entry box. Her fingers flew over the keyboard. "Alright, we're in."

L turned back to his phone. "We've got it covered. Call Ever. Near will contact the dean with the list of students he'll need information from. He just so happens to have skipped out on work tonight, so I'll take on his task and send Near the message along with the files he requests."

"Got it," Matt said. Then he hung up. Not even a minute later the ringtone went off again.

"L?"

"Ever. Is he there?"

"Yeah. He's in the library and heading toward the desks. I'm keeping my distance just to be safe."

"Good. Keep an eye on the students whose files he searches for. Text me the names and I'll combine them into an email, then slip the message in and send it to him."

"Alright. You've got access, right?"

"Yes. Mello has the files open. We're waiting for your signals."

Ever hung up. L turned to the Mello and Light. "Mel, you're already in, so when Ever sends us the names, you'll be compiling the email to Near. I'll keep watch on the phone and PA in case someone tries to contact the dean. Light, you watch the door in case anyone shows up."

The crew members nodded in agreement and continued as L had instructed. It wasn't long before Ever had sent the names of five students under Near's suspicions that he had searched while she watched him from behind. Mello compiled the email and slipped in a connection virus along with their message to send Near when he received the email.

"Alright, it's done," she said, hitting send. She promptly shut down the computer and turned toward the door. "Now come on. Let's get the others and scram."

Light didn't hear Mello's words. He was too focused on something else. Something outside. He held up a hand to stop Mello from moving any further. Yes, he was definitely sensing something. His newly heightened senses had picked something up, a soft noise, a faint trace of movement. Footsteps. They were clipped and businesslike, moving swiftly down the hallway toward the dean's office. Light jumped back as a fist pounded against the door.

"Dean Tanaka? Ari Tanaka, are you in there?"

Light froze. He knew that voice. He listened closely as it spoke again.

"Hello? Is anyone even there?" Another knock pounded against the door.

Light was sure of it now. He knew whose voice it was. _But no. That's impossible._

Someone let out a choked whisper behind him. "Shit."

The door slammed inwards, swinging on its hinges. A dark figure stood outside, one foot falling back after kicking the door violently open. Light stared. It couldn't be.

"Dad?"

Soichiro Yagami stood in the doorway, looking as solid and stoic as ever. He stared into the shadowed room, incandescent light from the hallway leaking through around his sharp, strong outline. "L. So you're back again."

L backed up against the window of the office, poised to launch himself at Soichiro. "Spare me the formalities, Yagami. You know I can't stay away from this place."

"If you hadn't defied the natural order, maybe things wouldn't have to be this way."

Light couldn't stop staring. Was this really him? His own father, who he'd watched die years earlier. No. It just didn't make sense. Even so, his father still hadn't even spared him a glance. He was too focused on L.

"Please. Would you rather I had just died like the rest of your pawns? I'm not stupid, Yagami. And let's face it. Things are much more interesting this way."

Mello had swiped a pistol from her jacket and held it trained on Soichiro. "You touch him, you die."

Light couldn't take it anymore. The words were out before he could stop them. "Dad? You- you're alive! I- " His father turned toward him. Light was startled by the venomous look on his father's face. He's never seen that look directed at him.

Suddenly Soichiro's face softened. "Light?" He stepped into the room, moving towards his son. Light tensed up, prepared to bolt. Soichiro held his hands up in a surrendering gesture. "No, please. I'm not going to hurt you, I just... You're okay."

"Light." L's voice cut through. "Light, snap out of it. He's baiting you. Don't believe him."

Light ignored him. He kept his gaze fixed on his father, who moved slowly closer. "Everyone said you were dead. I- I didn't know what to think. I've been so worried..."

Without thinking, Light reached out a hand toward Soichiro. His father took it. He felt real. He was solid as ever and gave off heat like any other human. Suddenly Light lurched forward. Soichiro had pulled him in closer, trapping him in a tight hug. "Light... I can't believe it. You're back."

Light took in everything. The smell of his father's cologne, the feeling of his freshly ironed shirt, the faint, familiar warmth he radiated. Everything matched Light's memories perfectly.

"Light, please." Mello's voice. "Get away from him. Now."

Without thinking, Light's hand had slipped into his pocket and his fingers wrapped around the handle of one of his guns. He pushed Soichiro away, holding the pistol out in front of him. "Who are you?"

Soichiro's face fell. He seemed hurt. "Light, don't you remember me?"

"No," Light murmured, shaking his head. "It's not true. You- I watched you when you- "

"I know what you think you saw Light." Soichiro was closing in again. "Please, if you'll just let me explain-"

"No." Light backed away, trembling. "You're not my father."

Soichiro's emotional demeanor disappeared. His face became and expression of oddly mixed pride and happiness. "So clever. You haven't changed at all, Light. Kira."

Anger leached its way into Light's soul. "You- What did you just call me?"

"I know everything about you, Light," Soichiro said calmly. "Kira. Isn't that your name now?"

"You're not my father," Light repeated. "Are you?"

Soichiro laughed. "You're right. I'm not your real father. I never was. No matter how much I acted like it, that's the truth. But if you'd stayed, then... I could have been. You could have regarded me as the closest thing to a father as you may ever have."

"W- what are you saying?" Light stuttered, keeping his gun trained on Soichiro.

"I know it seems like it's too late now,"he said calmly. "But you can still turn back. It doesn't matter what they told you. Stop running away from your destiny, Light. Embrace who you are." He took a step closer and placed a hand on Light's shoulder.

"Like hell I will."

Light's fingers squeezed against the trigger of his pistol. A gunshot tore through the air. Soichiro's eyes widened, then his image blurred. He seemed to disappear, then reappeared several feet away from where he had been standing only a split second before. The bullet flew through the air and punched a hole in the wall behind him. Then everything became a blur.

Light made a break for the door, L launching himself at Soichiro as Mello fired another shot and pushed him aside. Soichiro fell, then was back on his feet and chasing after them as they bolted down the hall. The three managed to make it to the door, slamming it shut in Soichiro's face. They dashed across the balcony over the main library. Light caught a glimpse of Near's pale silver head sticking out against the sea of people below, probably just killing time at this point. Ever was gone. When they reached the entrance, so was Matt.

Just past the exit, Light crashed into someone standing directly in his path. He fell to the ground and landed on top of the stranger. "What the hell!" he shouted.

Hands covered by fingerless gloves pushed him away. Matt scrambled out from under him. "Light! You guys made it! Come on, we've got to go. Now." He grabbed Light's arm, beginning to drag him down the wide concrete steps of the Institute.

Light grounded his feet and skidded them to a stop. "Hold on. What the hell is going on?"

Matt stared back at him, breathless. "The task force has caught up with us."

Light was confused. "The task force?"

"Yes." Behind his goggles, Matt's eyes were wide with fear. "But not the one you remember."

Without another word, he turned and continued to drag Light back to Otemachi station. It wasn't long before someone had caught up with them. A stranger dressed in a black suit appeared seemingly out of nowhere. He was sinewy and fast, dark-haired with piercing green eyes. He ran towards the fleeing hackers, gaining on them with inhuman speed. Matt's hand slipped into his pocket, drawing out a desert eagle. He twisted and fired at their assailant as they ran. The man went blurry, reappearing in flashes as he avoided the bullets. Not a second later, he had leaped into the air and brought Light to the ground.

Matt stopped short and turned around. "Light!"

Light could only answer with a short shriek as the stranger flipped him over, twisted his arms behind his back and dragged him to his feet. He felt the cold metal barrel of a revolver press against the side of his head.

"Let go of him," Matt demanded, his gun aimed at the stranger.

"Silence, human," the man- the program- retorted. "You know that you couldn't hit me if you tried. And you know what will happen if you do." Light heard the hammer of the revolver click into place, prepared to tear a hole through his head.

Light didn't know where it came from. It felt... natural. Like an instinct, almost. One second he was being held in a headlock, helpless, a gun held against his head. The next, he had twisted out of the program's grasp, had his hands pressed against his chest, then- BOOM.

A pulse of energy flowed through Light, starting in his chest, flowing down his arms and through his fingertips. He heard the program scream. Then he tensed up, his face frozen, and fell to the ground.

Light stared at the task force program's twitching body. _What did I just-_

He felt Matt's hand on his shoulder, tugging him forward. "Quit staring and run!"

Light could hear sirens in the distance. The commotion at the library had undoubtedly made someone alert the police. Red and blue lights flashed from behind them as they approached the Otemachi station. Light and Matt slowed down as two police cars pulled up, blocking them off from their escape route.

"Stay right where you are!" a voice blared from behind a megaphone. "Drop any weapons you are carrying and put your hands in the air!"

Matt slipped his desert eagle back into his jacket and complied with their demands. Light followed suit, not knowing what else to do. An officer emerged from each car, walking towards them with tasers in hand. Matt remained motionless as one officer approached him, asking him questions about the disturbance at the library.

"Were you involved at all?"

"Yes. In fact, I'd say I may have been the cause of it."

"Is this young man with you?"

"He's here, isn't he?"

"Was he involved as well?"

"We both know that this conversation is going nowhere. Of course he was."

"I'm afraid you'll have to come with me, kid," the officer said, reaching for Matt's arm with a pair of handcuffs.

"I'd rather not." Matt threw a swift kick at the officer's chest, sending him flying backwards. He slammed against one of the squad cars. Stunned, the other officer tried to grab Light and drag him back to the other squad car. Before he had moved even an inch, Light's hand hand found its way over his heart. Another pulse burst through Light's fingertips. The officer froze, his face rigid. Then he crumpled lifelessly to the ground.

Light stepped back, shocked. He knelt down to the officer's body and placed his fingertips on his neck, where a pulse should have been beating. He felt nothing. "Matt-"

"Light, run!"

Gunshots tore through the air. The two remaining cops in the squad cars had finally come to life and were leaning out the doors of both cars, firing madly at the two rogues in front of them. Light bolted forward, running toward the source of the gunfire, weaving left and right to avoid being hit. He reached the left squad car, planted his foot on the front bumper, and launched himself into the air , flying over the car and landing on the street ahead. He took off at a sprint. He heard Matt's hurried footfalls not far behind his own. They kept running, never stopping to breathe, never looking back until they had reached the subway station.

Ever was the first one Light saw. She turned and grabbed the sleeve of his jacket, pulling him into the crowd. Mello materialized out of the sea of people. She ran to Matt and jumped into his arms, burying her face in his neck, whispering "You're okay. Oh my god, you're okay."

A tinny, mechanical ringing sounded out from the mess of noise in the busy subway station. It was the same payphone they had entered through, tucked away in a corner of the platform and ringing furiously. "Where's L?" Light asked Ever, raising his voice above the noise.

"He's already back on the ship. We split up back at the institute and Rinn got him out through the reception desk." Ever glanced at the payphone. Mello and Matt had disappeared. "Follow my lead."

Ever dragged Light through the crowd to the phone booth. She stepped inside, sliding the glass door shut. Light watched as she picked up the phone and held it to her ear. Her avatar began to pixelate. There was a flash of icy blue light. Ever dissolved into a spray of codes and disappeared.

Light knew what he had to do. He stepped into the booth and slid the door shut. The phone was ringing again. He did exactly as Ever had shown him. The world began to blur, colors and sounds fading and swirling together. There was a flash. Then everything was gone.


	7. Chapter 7

More Than Alive- Chapter 7

Light's eyes flew open. He jerked forward and sat bolt upright. His head was pounding, trying to comprehend whatever it was that he had just seen.

_What did I do? All I do is touch someone near their heart, and then... what?_

"Light." A voice brought him back to reality. A hand rested on his shoulder. "Light, are you okay?"

It was L. He was standing beside the jack chair, gaze fixed curiously on Light. "Um..." Light mumbled, trying to form a sentence. "I- think so. What did I-"

"I see you're confused about your new ability." L somehow seemed to understand exactly what was going through Light's head. "We were watching on the feed. I'll admit, it is a pretty strange advantage. Not exactly what I'd expect from someone like you."

Light pulled himself to his feet. "My new ability? You mean that thing that I sort of... I don't know, instinctively did?" He walked over to the control panel and watched the streams of code rushing past on the screen. "What was I doing, exactly?"

L approached him and opened a window on the screen. It filled immediately with more codes, which then took on vague, flickering shapes. Light realized it was the Matrix, not as he had seen it, but as it truly was. L pressed a few keys on the control panel and the footage began to speed up and rewind, following Light's point of view from the mission in reverse order. He watched as the police officer attack came into view. L stopped the footage as the officer's face appeared, shocked and frozen. "Right there."

"What?" Light asked.

"This is when it happened, right?"

"Yes. It's like I just... touched him, and then he went rigid and just... died."

L nodded. "It certainly seems that way. Rinn and I were watching the feed. From what we picked up from your signals, it seems that you somehow caused his heart to spontaneously stop."

Light turned away from the screen to look at L. "How did this happen? Where did this- this ability- come from?"

L bit his thumbnail, concentrating. "It's possible that you may have been created with this ability. It's not an unusual thing among newborns. Take Matt, for instance. And Mello, too. She's fireproof. We've determined that she picked up the ability from the explosion that left her avatar with that facial scar..." L trailed off.

Light stared at him, confused. He was obviously thinking of something. "L? What is it?"

"That's it." He faced Light again, eyes glowing. "I've got it. You acquired your ability from contact with the death note. It all makes sense. You used the power so often, and now that you're here, it must have rubbed off somehow. That's where your heart-stopping ability is from."

"So it's from the death note..." Light's thoughts wandered off. He remembered when he had wielded the death note. Funny. It seemed like such a long time ago.

Another thought rose out of the daydreaming haze of Light's brain. Soichiro Yagami. He was his enemy now. His own father...

No. Not anymore. He wasn't really his father. He'd only been acting like he was.

Then if Soichiro wasn't his father, who was he? He had pretended, as if it were true, for so many years. He'd been exactly the same as every other person he knew. But he wasn't. He wasn't even human. He was... Light didn't even know. He didn't want to know. His life had been a lie. That was all he cared about.

"Kira-kun?" L's voice brought him back to reality. He was looking at him, concern in his dark grey eyes. "Is something wrong?"

Light had turned away from him while lost in his thoughts. He felt that his face had fallen into a frown. He quickly returned to his neutral expression and looked back toward L. "No. It's nothing. I'm just... It's a lot to take in, that's all." At this point, everyone in the holodeck had left, leaving him and L alone. Light turned around and started toward the door.

"This is about what Soichiro said, isn't it?"

Light stopped. He bit his lip, his hand resting on the doorway, one foot already stepping into the hallway. He turned his head to look back, but decided against it. He looked ahead and kept walking. He made his way back down the main corridor and through the common room to the staircase and back to his dorm. He collapsed onto his bed, exhausted. He didn't want to deal with this right now.

He heard soft footsteps outside in the upstairs hallway. He'd left his door ajar, and a shadowy silhouette passed through the ribbon of light that leaked into his room. L materialized in the doorway. "Light, you didn't answer me."

Light stared up at him from his bed. "Okay, yes. It's about what my- no. It's about what _Soichiro_ said. Are you happy?"

L pushed the door open further and stood there, leaning against the doorframe. "Light, listen, if it's bothering you, you should talk to someone."

Light sat up, indignant. "Yeah? And who would care?" He turned away from L and stared at the wall. "The people on this ship are different from me. They wouldn't understand."

L stepped into the room and shut the door. "I may not know exactly how you feel, Light. But I'm here, and I'm willing to listen."

Light turned back and looked at him. "Alright. Fine." He sighed and looked down at the blanket as L settled down on the bed next to him. "It's just... It just feels so wrong. My entire life I've been living a lie. I'm just so confused, and I don't understand any of it. I- I can't even be sure who I am anymore." He looked up at L, eyes wide. "Who is he? Why did he pretend to be my father for so many years? What does he want from me?"

"Soichiro is a program," L said. "He is part of the Matrix task force, the defense mechanism of the virtual world. I found out the truth about him not long after Rowan contacted me the second time. I don't know what he wants from you, or why he went to such measures to spend years earning your trust. It must feel... shattering. Just to have your whole life exposed like that."

"It does," Light said. He pulled his knees up to his chest, taking up the same position as L. "I don't know how to describe it any other way."

He felt L's hand on his shoulder. "You'll pull through this. I know you will."

Light didn't respond. He stayed there, rigid, not sure what would happen next. He heard L speak up again. "You're tense, Light."

"I know that."

"Yes, but do you think maybe you would let me... um... help you out with it?"

Light jerked away from L. "Wait, what? What the hell are you talking about?"

L stared back at him skeptically. "What? No! That is not what I meant!" He jumped, shying away from Light. "I was only going to ask if you wanted some massage therapy or anything. I'm a good reflexologist, and I thought it would help you relax. Not- not _that_."

"Oh." Light uncurled from his position and stretched out on the bed. "That would be nice, I guess."

L perched on the floor at the end of the bed and took Light's bare feet in his hands. Light winced as sharp pressure dug into the sole of his foot. "Relax," L said, continuing his work just a bit more gently. "You'll get used to the feeling of it."

Light took a deep breath and closed his eyes. L had been right. This did make him feel better. He relaxed and let go of his thoughts of Soichiro and his life in the virtual world, focusing instead on the pressure of L's fingers over his feet.

_Wait. This feels familiar._

Light's eyes opened. He remembered this situation. He'd been here before. It was the last time he'd been with L before...

Light didn't want to think of it. He'd sworn to himself that the past was behind him. He wouldn't dwell on his past life anymore. But the memories were still there, shadows in the back of his mind, haunting him. All the things he'd done. All the lives he'd taken. The monster he had let himself become. And L...

Light looked down at him, sitting there at the end of the bed. He looked small, skinny and fragile. He wasn't the mastermind threat Light remembered. Now he was just L.

After all he'd done to him... after_ killing him_, for the love of god... he still wanted his friendship. He didn't hate him. He wasn't his enemy. He never had been.

_Why are you being so nice to me, L? Why do you still care?_

Light's eyes burned. "S-stop."

He felt the pressure from L's fingers disappear. "Light?"

Light's fingers clutched tightly at the blanket. He looked away from L, trying to hide the tears in his eyes. "Stop being so nice to me, L. I- I don't deserve it. You should hate me. You shouldn't have saved me. You should have just let me die."

"Don't say that. You already know why I set you free. Do you still not believe me?" L slipped his hand under Light's chin and lifted his face, leaving it impossible for Light to conceal his feelings. "I know who you really are, Light. You're not a god, and you're not a monster. You're just human."

Light took a shuddering breath. His eyes stung as tears fought to escape. He could already feel a warm, salty drop streaking down his cheek. Another shaky breath turned into a sob. L reached his arms out and wrapped them around Light's shoulders. "It's okay," he whispered. "It's okay, just let it out. I won't tell anyone about this."

Light couldn't take it anymore. He clutched L tightly against him and buried his face in his friend's shoulder. L didn't say a word, only stayed there and let Light break down, waiting for his feelings to subside. Eventually, Light's sobs softened back into deep, raspy breathing. He pulled back and wiped his face._ Damn it. I really need to stop doing that._

L stayed perched in front of him on the bed, watching him from behind his curtain of messy black hair. "You think you'll be alright now?"

Light nodded. "Yeah, I just- needed to get that off my chest, that's all."

L smiled. "That's all I needed to hear." He slipped out the door and shut it behind him, leaving Light alone with his thoughts.

It was strange. He'd never been that close to L before. Somehow, it felt... different. He wasn't sure what it was. He'd never felt that way about anyone before. Not Takeda, Misa, or anyone. And he'd been much closer to those two than he had ever been with L.

Light stared at the closed door, where L had stood only a few seconds ago. He imagined him standing there with his awkward, bent posture, that shy smile lighting up his wide, shadowed eyes. A strange, fuzzy heat built up in Light's chest.

_No. No way. Absolutely not._

He couldn't believe he was thinking that.

_There's no way it could be true._

It all made sense now. He understood everything. Why he had never felt anything for Takeda or Misa. They'd only been pawns to him. But L...

L was different. He actually cared about him. He hadn't cared at all about anyone else, but now...

_No._

Now he understood. It was L that he had wanted all along.

**Oh my. *nosebleed***


	8. Chapter 8

More Than Alive- Chapter 8

"Alright. Everyone's here, time for a recap."

Light was back in the Matrix. It had been two days since their last mission. Now they were returning for another one. The fact that the task force had attacked them on their last mission suggested that they must know something about their goal of freeing Near. Now the mission was to infiltrate the Task Force headquarters, located in the same place as the law-enforcement Task Force Light remembered, and gather as much information as they could on what the Force knew about Near. If they cut his connection to them, there would be no hope of ever getting him free.

Light listened as Ever retold the outline of their mission. They had jacked in through a payphone in a mall half a mile from the Task Force HQ that was closed for renovation. The inside of the massive building smelled of wet paint and plaster, tarps and scaffolding everywhere. Light didn't pay attention to Ever's words. He already knew what their mission was. He was looking at L instead. The strange feelings that had arisen a few days earlier still hadn't left. Whenever he was near L, the feelings flared. He couldn't stop it, and he had no idea where they came from. He only hoped that his sunglasses hid the fact that he was staring.

The recap ended and then they were off.

The first part of the mission was easy. Fake IDs had been provided by Rinn to get them past the tight security at the front door while Mello chatted up the receptionist, pretending to be looking for her boyfriend, currently an intern to the police force. Before long she'd been admitted as well, but remained under the watch of a few security guards, keeping them busy while Light and the others went on to find the Matrix Task Force sector. It was buried deep in the building, the area tightly secured and off limits to even those who worked there.

It was almost an hour of navigating winding hallways, slipping past security and flashing IDs before they finally reached the bolted steel double doors in the deepest recesses of the building. Funny. Light didn't remember the Task Force building being this big. Judging by the number of staircases they'd descended, he guessed that they were below the subway system at this point. He'd known before that the building was built partially underground, but he hadn't known that it went down this far.

The door seemed to be locked by a digital keypad, coded to lock the doors from the inside. Matt pressed a hand against the screen above the tiny vertical keyboard and closed his eyes. He opened them again a second later and punched a few numbers into the keypad. A sensor went off. The keypad sunk into the wall and flipped over, revealing a small black lens on the other side. The lens flashed red, and a new message appeared on the screen above the keypad. Please scan.

"Looks like we'll need a retina scan," Matt murmured.

"Think you'll be able to manipulate it?" Ever asked.

"I can try," Matt answered. "I can't be sure that it's going to work, though." He pressed his hands on either side of the keypad and stared into the scanner. The red, dancing laser pattern reflected in his eyes. The screen above the keypad flashed, static interrupting its circuits. Matt stared harder, and eventually the screen turned to static and went dark. The keypad began smoking, then a soft mechanical grinding sounded behind the wall and the doors slid open. The four of them rushed in, leaving the doors open. Matt had broken the locking mechanism anyway, so there was no point in shutting them again.

More hallways. More wandering. It wasn't much longer now. The hallways here were different. The walls were a perfect spotless white instead of the pale beige of the rest of the building. The floor was cold, steely linoleum. There were no ordinary light fixtures. The ceiling seemed to glow all on its own.

By the time they finally stopped, Light had begun to panic. He had no idea how deep into the building they were. L and Ever had better come up with a good escape plan in case things got messy. Otherwise things would end very badly- and very fast.

Ever pressed a key code into the code-locked handle of a nearby office door. She pushed it open and the rest of them crowded inside behind her. The office was huge, at least twice the size of the common room back on the Tempest. Though the room was windowless, It still had an air of elegance and high rank. Whoever's office this was, they were obviously in a very high position.

Light studied the room. Shelves lined the tall, spacious walls, file cabinets, a coffeemaker, a futuristic-looking metal desk at the center of the room in front of a leather-covered luxury swivel chair... But absolutely no sign of a computer. "Hm. That's weird."

"What?" It was Matt, standing by the door, leaning with one ear pressed against it.

"There's no computer in here."

"You really don't know anything about the Task Force, do you?" L was leaning over the desk at the room's center, gazing fixedly at its surface. Light moved over next to him. He saw that the top of the desk wasn't just a flat plane of metal like he'd expected. The surface was smooth, glassy and black. L tapped the surface with a finger. The desktop brightened, as if a light behind it had suddenly switched on. A small, glowing blue box appeared, along with an image of a keyboard. Above the box a message read ENTER PASSWORD.

"Oh." This wasn't a desk at all. It was all one giant tablet computer.

"Matt. I need you for a second," L said, beckoning Matt over to the desk. Ever had set herself to work picking the locks of the file cabinets as Matt read the computer's codes and broke them into the database. As he turned away from the desk, Light caught a glimpse of a nameplate on the front.

_Soichiro Yagami._ This was his father's office.

While L and Matt picked through the computer for information on Near, Light sifted through the file cabinets with Ever, searching for whatever knowledge the task force had of their mission. They were no ordinary files. Each separated folder held what appeared to be a paper-thin picture frame which responded to touch, a thin, airy membrane stretched over the frame that lit up and displayed whatever the file held, answering to the movement of Light's fingers against it.

Light flipped through file after file, growing bored as the mission wore on. This was getting monotonous. He'd gone through hundreds of folders, but he didn't find anything that would have anything to do with Near, Nate River, or anything that even remotely related to him. All he saw were status updates, census records, old battle plans and operations, a file on someone named Light Yagami, studies of human behavior-

_Wait, what?_

Light froze. His gaze flickered back to a silver file folder a tabs away from where a finger held his place in their search. He stared at the strangely familiar name on its tag. Light Yagami. It was a file about him.

Glancing over his shoulder to make sure that the others were busy, Light turned back to the file cabinet and flipped his way back to the file displaying his name. He gently lifted the paper-thin frame from its folder and tapped the center. Lighted codes spilled onto the translucent page. Images appeared, images of him, along with captions and labels in some foreign code that Light didn't understand.

"Hey. We found something."

Light turned around toward the desk. L had looked up and called over the other members of the crew. Matt was standing hunched over the desk, reading something that Light couldn't see. Still holding the file-frame, he walked over to the desk to see their findings. He looked down at the desk screen to see another file in a format similar to the one he held. Images of Nate River were scattered throughout the file, along with the blocks of unrecognizable code-text. Matt was scanning it, reading the strange symbols like letters from a book.

"Damn it. Looks like they know more than we thought."

Ever leaned over the desk. "They have his records from birth, and it seems like they've been following his activity very closely. They must have gone pretty far to get all this."

"Yes, it's likely that all this was difficult to come by, even for them," L said, nodding as he focused on the file. "They seem oddly determined to keep Near captive. He must be even more important to them than previously thought." He tapped a small icon in the corner of the file page and pressed a few commands onto the touchscreen keyboard. "Let's send a copy of this back to the ship. We'll need to know all we can about this." A small loading bar flashed on screen. The little grey bar filled with color and disappeared. L looked up toward Light to see the file he held in his hands. "What have you got there?"

Light felt heat flood to his face and he looked down at the delicate frame in his hands. "I- um, I really don't know. I was going through the files and I picked it up, then you called us over-"

_Oh god. Please don't make me explain. I don't know if I can._

Thankfully Ever's phone rang, cutting him off. She pulled it out from the pocket of her windbreaker and pressed the call button. "This is Ever."

Mello's voice, strained and ragged, burst from the speaker. "Ever? You guys need to get out of there. Now!" Static. Heavy breathing. Panic stabbed into Light's heart like a pin.

"Mello?" Ever said, the calm in her voice wavering. "Mello, calm down. What happened?"

"They're back. They were out in the city when you came in, but they're back now. They're headed back to the HQ. I was there. I saw them come back. I panicked and I just ran out of there, but I think they still saw me. They know we're here. I am so sorry-"

"Mello, It's okay," Ever said, fear seeping into her voice. "Keep running. Call Rinn and tell him to set up a jack-out connection. We'll- We'll meet you out there, okay?"

The fast, ragged breaths steadied. "Okay. Just- just make it out okay, alright?"

Ever nodded, even though Mello wasn't there to see it. "We will."

Then she hung up. The four of them shut down the computer-desk and locked the file cabinets. Light looked at the file that was still in his hands, the file that had his name on it. He reached toward one of the file drawers to place the fragile frame back in its folder. Curiosity held him back. He couldn't do it. It was his file. He had to know what it was.

A light press on the corners on the frame showed Light that the file could shrink to whatever size he needed it to be. He retracted the frame until it was small enough to slip into one of the hidden pockets of his blazer alongside his phone and one of his pistols.

The hackers ran through the hallways of the Task Force HQ, sprinting through the corridors to get back to the main building, out of this tight, restricted underground area. Adrenaline pulsed though Light, his mind running wild. His first encounter with the program Task Force had been unpleasant enough, and that had been out in the open in the streets of Tokyo, surrounded by possible escape routes. But here... Here there was nowhere to run. The defensive programs could appear at any second. They would be trapped. Then dead. Then there would be nothing.

The broken sliding steel doors that marked off the Matrix Task Force from the rest of the building appeared at the end of the hallway ahead of them. They were almost there. It wouldn't be long now. So close...

An explosion shattered the air. Something whizzed through the air and slammed into the wall behind them, the plaster crumbling from the impact. Light stopped dead. It was a bullet.

The Task Force had arrived.

The hackers stopped in their tracks, staring straight into the android eyes of a group of six men dressed in black suits. At first glance, they appeared to be ordinary businessmen. But there was something different about them, the way they moved, how their faces were rigid and expressed no emotion. One at the front of the group stood, rigid, facing the invaders. He held a revolver that had fired the warning shot. Soichiro Yagami.

L stepped forward. "I see you've finally returned."

One of the programs approached from the back of the group. He gestured harshly toward the door. "What did you do?"

"What was necessary," Matt spat bitterly. He slipped one of his desert eagles out of its pocket in his vest and pulled back the hammer.

As soon as the weapon's firing mechanism had clicked into place, the Task Force surged forward and seized each of them. Light felt a starched, suited arm wrap itself around his throat and another around his shoulders, holding him down with unnatural strength.

Soichiro remained in his place, still holding the gun. He raised his shooting arm. "You've broken an entirely new boundary. This was a line I didn't think even you would cross, L," He said. He wrapped his finger around the trigger and aimed at the dark hacker. "Now you pay."

A shot fired. It wasn't from Soichiro's gun. There was a scream, and suddenly Matt was free, his captor leaning against the wall, blood gushing from his shattered hand. He darted forward and slammed head-on into Soichiro, pressed his gun to the program's chest and fired. Blood splattered onto the walls, and everything went to hell.

Light threw his weight forward. The program holding him back toppled over and sprawled on the floor. The others begun to fight back as well. Having broken free, Light followed Matt as he sprinted forward through the doors, out of the restricted area and into the main Task Force HQ. More gunfire. More blood. Before long Ever and L were tailing behind them, racing through the empty hallways to their escape.

Clipped footsteps pounded against the floor behind them. The Task Force was catching up. Light glanced over his shoulder. Someone appeared in the hallway behind them, one of the nameless programs racing toward them at an inhuman speed. Another appeared behind him. He launched himself forward and grabbed Ever, dragging her back and throwing her to the ground. Light drew his pistol as the other program advanced toward him. He heard L and Matt's footfalls disappear in the distance. _At least they'll get out safely._

The suited program took a flying leap toward Light. He crashed into him, throwing him to the floor with his hands around his throat. Light's pistol went flying from his hand. He rolled over under the weight of the Task Force agent, struggling to get free. He felt the program's hands tighten around his neck. Light choked, unable to take a breath. He stared up into the program's unfeeling eyes as the hands grew tighter and tighter, crushing his windpipe, cutting him off from the air. Light scratched at his hands, helpless, his brain starved for oxygen. He reached his hands forward, shaking, and pressed them into the program's chest, as if trying helplessly to push him away. The program laughed. Then the pulse fired and he was twitching on the floor, stunned.

Light took in a huge gulp of air. His senses flooded back and he turned toward Ever, who was still grappling with the other program. She was growing weak, hopelessly losing against the superhuman android. He was on top of her, beating her senseless and laughing at her futile attempts to fight back. Light pounced and landed hard on the program's back. He threw him off Ever and rolled him onto his back. He glanced quickly at Ever as she scrambled to her feet, panting. Light flattened his palms against the chest of the agent on the ground in front of him. Another pulse powered up in his chest and shot through the agent, who shuddered from the force, then went limp, staring up at him with shocked, unblinking eyes, twitching weakly on the floor.

Light stood up and turned toward Ever, who was waiting for him with a knife at the ready, prepared to bolt. They both turned and ran. Then a gunshot tore through the air.

Light felt pain shoot through his leg behind his right knee. He toppled to the ground, a shockwave sending a tremor through him. A warm, sticky wetness seeped into the fabric of his pants that could only be blood. His blood.

Ever screamed. "Light! Look out!"

Another gunshot, this one from Ever. Light sensed movement behind him. Something heavy slammed into him and grabbed him from behind, dragging him painfully to his feet. Another program. Light gritted his teeth against the pain in his leg. He stared at Ever's terrified face as she stood there, unsure of whether she should stay or go. "Ever," Light shouted. "Run!"

He watched as her eyes brimmed with tears. "I'm so sorry," she whispered. Then she turned and ran. Light watched her disappear down the hallway. The barrel of a gun pressed against the side of his head. He heard the metallic _click_ of the hammer sliding into place.

"Wait."

Light heard the voice rise up from out of nowhere. The program turned around, facing Light in the same direction. It was Soichiro. He was standing in the middle of the hallway, the two stunned programs next to him, peeling themselves off the floor. Blood soaked the front of his shirt, but he seemed perfectly fine, despite the fact that Matt had just fired a bullet straight through his heart. "Release him."

Light felt the program's arms loosen their grip. He was standing on his own now, the program guarding him from behind. He didn't try to run. He knew it would be pointless.

"He's my son. If there's anyone who is going to end this, it will be me." Soichiro was still holding the revolver from before, its line of fire trained on Light. "Leave," He commanded. "I want to do this alone."

The programs retreated back into the restricted area where they had come from. Light stood deathly still, Soichiro holding him at gunpoint. He stared at his face, the pain in his eyes. Light didn't know why it was there.

"Light." He couldn't ignore the heaviness in Soichiro's voice. "Why?"

Light stared defiantly back at the Task Force leader. "Why what?"

"All of this. This life that you chose. It could have been different."

"Yes, it could have. I could have died."

"Please understand me, Light. I wouldn't have let you die. I had plans for you. You could have become great. You could have become the god you had always dreamed of being. We would have ruled the world, Light. But instead you... You chose _this_." He spat the word out as if it were poison. "You had such potential. You can't even imagine what you could have become. But... Why, Light? Why did you choose this over the life you could have been given, had you only stayed?"

Light stared at the program in front of him, frozen. "W-what are you talking about?"

"Light, please, listen to me..."

"Put the gun down." Light demanded. His father stared at him as if the words were some foreign language. Light repeated himself. "Put the gun down and I'll listen."

Soichiro paused, hesitant. He lowered his revolver and placed it back in its holster. "Light-"

"I'm sorry," Light said, dropping his gaze to the floor. "I- I didn't know. It was L. He sent me that message the night before- Before it happened. I didn't know what else to do." He moved closer to Soichiro, slack with defeat. He removed the file from his pocket. "I found this in your office. I was hoping someone could explain it to me."

Soichiro took the file from Light and expanded it back to its normal size. He lit up the membrane stretched across the frame and the file opened. "How did you find this?"

"I saw it while we were looking for whatever information you had gathered about Near. You knew about our mission. We needed to know what you had found." Light looked up at Soichiro and rested a hand on his shoulder. "What is it? What did you want from me?"

Soichiro looked down at him. "Does this mean you've chosen to join us?"

"No."

Not a second later, Light's hand slid from Soichiro's shoulder to his chest. A pulse fired from Light's chest into his arm, through his fingertips, and into Soichiro. The blast knocked him backward, and the file went flying and skittered across the floor. Light fell forward and landed on top of the program, hands pressed into the fabric of his shirt. He shot another pulse through him.

"You lied to me!" He screamed. Rage blazed through him, powering up another shockwave and sending it pulsing through Soichiro. "You were never my father! You've been lying to me my entire life!" He blasted the program under him with pulse after pulse, ignoring Soichiro's screams, racking him with pain and tearing away his strength until there was nothing left. "I will never join you! Never!"

The anger subsided. Light was kneeling on the floor, panting, leaning over the program lying limply on the floor. Soichiro Yagami. Tears burned in the corners of Light's eyes. "How- how could you?"

"Light..." Soichiro breathed. He stayed there, lying on the floor. He didn't twitch, didn't recover and rise to his feet like the others had. The program had gone pale, staring weakly up at Light, gasping for air and trying desperately to speak. "Light, I..."

Then it stopped. Soichiro had gone deathly still. The gasping, labored breathing stopped and the sharp, steely light in his eyes disappeared. Light stared down at him. "Soichiro?" He placed his fingers on his neck, trying to find a pulse. No matter how he searched, he couldn't feel anything. No heartbeat, no breath, only dead silence and stillness. "Soichiro?" Light repeated. He choked. "Soichiro?_ Dad?_"

Nothing. No response. Light stared down at the body in front of him, eyes wide. He was dead.

He had just killed his own father.

In the silence, Light's phone rang. He didn't hear it. He only stared, heart pounding, at Soichiro's body lying lifeless on the floor. _Oh god. Oh god, what have I done._

The phone kept ringing. Light finally scraped together the strength to stagger to his feet and answer. L's voice sounded from the other end. "Light? Kira? Are you okay? Answer me!"

"Yes," Light said, his voice hollow. "Yes, I- I think so."

"We're outside, near an office building a few blocks away from the Task Force HQ. Do you know where that is?"

"Yes. I'll be there soon."

"Okay." L paused. "Light, are you sure you're-"

Light hung up. He couldn't take his eyes off his father. The file was still on the floor, lying where it had fallen, still intact. Light walked toward it, picked up the delicate frame, shrank it and slid it into his pocket. He had to leave. The longer he stayed, the more danger he was in.

With one last glance at Soichiro's body, Light forced himself to walk away.


	9. Chapter 9

**Okay, one word of warning before starting this chapter. Yaoi. If you don't like it, don't read it.**

**That is all. Please, continue.**

More Than Alive- Chapter 9

"What's this supposed to be?"

Matt stared at the control panel monitor, a confused look on his face. He was looking at the cache of files that they had downloaded during the mission. Mello was behind him, her arms around his waist, leaning her head on his shoulder. She pointed out a second icon in the cache. "Looks like we've picked up something extra."

Light sat up in his jack chair and propped himself up on his elbows. "What's going on?"

Rinn was standing behind him, unplugging Light's vitals monitor. "Another file's been picked up. We don't know what it is. Come and check it out."

Light stood up and followed everyone else to the control panel. Matt tapped the second icon and opened the newfound file. The tiny box expanded to fill the screen. The symbols flooded onto the screen, then translated into readable text, alongside...

Pictures of Light. The file contained pictures of Light. And the information was all about him.

_Wait. This is that file that I stole._

"What's this?" L thought out loud. He skimmed over the file. "That doesn't make any sense. Why do they have a file about you, Kira?"

Light read over the lines of information. It was like living his life all over again. The Task Force seemed to know everything about him. Even that he had played Kira for six years and was never caught.

So it was true. The Task Force really did have something planned for him. And somehow, by breaking free, he'd ended their plans. "What else does this file say?"

Matt scrolled down, more text and pictures appearing on the page. Light's eyes followed the lines of text. Then he stopped. His heart froze. He couldn't believe what he was reading.

"Light has received the death note. The shinigami Ryuk has been assigned to him. The shinigami currently has no knowledge of the mission," Light whispered, reading to himself. These sounded like journal entries, as if he were experiment, written by someone who had been keeping close tabs on him his entire life. He went on.

"L has been hired to investigate the Kira case. Light continues to feign his innocence and work in secret. Kira has become a larger influence than previously thought. With L, the case may be solved within a year. It seems Light may be joining the Task Force sooner than expected."

"Light continues to perform his vigilante justice as Kira. Misa Amane has joined him, currently being followed by female shinigami Rem. Like Ryuk, Rem also has no knowledge of the mission. Misa possesses the shinigami eyes, giving her enhanced powers and making her a powerful weapon for Light. Whether she is a liability or a possible subject is yet to be decided."

"Kira case has been ongoing for six months. L has begun to appear as a threat. He may have discovered the motives of the underground Task Force. Light has taken him as a threat as well. Suspicions are that L may not be a danger to the mission for much longer."

"L has been freed. Light remains in his position as Kira, with Misa as his accomplice. The future has become unpredictable. Our mission could possibly be at risk."

Light's heart pounded as he read through the file, whispering the words to himself as if he didn't believe them. The words described everything that had happened over the past few years with shocking accuracy. Sayu's kidnapping, Near, Mello, Takeda, Soichiro's own death, watching Light from the shadows, everything. Even some things Light had never heard before. Mello's secret ties to L. L attacking the task force trying to send a message to Light. Suspicions over Near. A suicide pact between Mello and Matt to set themselves free after bringing Kira to justice and go out as heroes. Light read on to the final entries.

"Mello and Matt are free. Light is under a greater threat than ever before. L has yet to return, though repeated attempts have been made to contact Light. Misa has been evaluated as another subject of the mission and continues her alliance with Light."

"Near has discovered Kira's identity. Tomorrow Light will be joining us. The entire situation has been orchestrated. Matsuda is currently being held in custody. Satou has taken on his appearance and will carry out the mission. L is no longer a threat."

"The mission has ended. Light is free. We've failed. It's over."

Light stopped. "What the hell is this?" he murmured. He stared at the page, his brain struggling to absorb everything he had just read. "What is this supposed to mean?"

"Hold on," Rinn cut in. He scrolled the page further down. "There's more."

"The gleaning connection is completed. Upon the completion of the mission, Ryuk, having given up on Light, will kill him with his own death note. The bullets in Satou's gun have been encoded with the gleaning connection. Once Light has been shot, the code will embed into him. When Light's avatar is no longer alive, the connection will activate.

The gleaning connection strips a user's soul from its avatar upon said avatar's deactivation. The soul's consciousness is retained through the connection and is bound to the virtual world. The soul then can be transplanted into a new avatar, though it will no longer be attached to a physical body in the outside world.

Blueprints for Light and Misa's program avatars are currently under construction. Rem's remains have been kept contained and her shinigami powers extracted. They are prepared for insertion into the new avatars. Once the process has been completed, the subjects will awaken as if from a coma. They will then be a new form of shinigami program with a human appearance. They will prove to be powerful weapons in the defense of the Matrix."

Silence. Rinn had stopped reading. The file stayed where it was, glowing on the screen, displaying all its information like an open book. No one dared speak.

Light couldn't breathe. He stared unblinkingly at the screen, his eyes beginning to sting from the lack of moisture. His entire body had gone numb._ No._

This was what his father had meant. This is what he had been created for. What his entire life had been leading up to, right up until the moment he swallowed the black pill. _No._

It was impossible. Light couldn't handle it. This was too much._ No. No. No._

"No," Light breathed. "No." He backed away from the screen. His breath was coming short and fast, his head going dizzy. Light could feel himself trembling. "No. It can't be."

"Light?" Ever's soft voice cut into his thoughts. It didn't do anything to stop the pounding in his head, his racing heart, the fact that he felt as if he were drowning.

"This..." Light whispered, choking on his own words. "This is what he... What he had been planning... he had planned this for me all along? My whole life?"

"Light. Kira, calm down. Breathe." L's voice, cool, calming, but completely ineffective against the thought's rushing through Light's head.

"He looks like he's about to pass out." Mello.

"Kira? Light, can you hear me?" Matt.

"Oh god," Light stammered, shaking his head. "N-no. It's- It's wrong. It's just so wrong."

"Light," L said again. He stepped toward Light and touched his shoulder. "Light, get a hold of yourself." He felt L grab his arm and try to steady him. Soft, fluttering heat exploded in Light's chest. He shook L away.

"I- I was- going to... become one of them?" he murmured, not believing the words even when he said them. "He thought I would- A program? I- I don't even... No."

Rinn said something. Light couldn't hear it. His hearing had gone fuzzy. So had his vision. Everything began to blur. Sounds became stifled and faint. Light stumbled back another step. "I- I can't take this. I... I can't..."

Light's stomach twisted. He felt as if he were about to vomit. He turned away from the control panel. He couldn't make himself believe it was true, no matter how long he stared at that damned file. It was too horrible. He couldn't take it. He wished he'd never found it.

Without another word, Light ran from the room.

The world was going gray all around Light as he sped away from the holodeck, his feet pounding against the cold linoleum floor. He reached the common room at the other end of the ship. He didn't get much further than that. Light collapsed at the foot of the stairs. His chest rose and fell rapidly, still gasping for air. Light felt as if he were in the waste disposal all over again, cold, freezing, drowning as icy water surrounded him and leached his life away. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't feel anything. Everything was going dark...

Warmth. Someone was close by. A hand on his shoulder, then an arm around his ribs, his own arm being looped over someone's shoulders. He heard a voice, familiar, soothing even though he couldn't understand what it said. Light began to breathe normally again. The world slowly came back to him. The stranger was dragging him up the stairs, probably to return him to his room where he could recover from the shock. The ground went flat again. He was in the upstairs hallway. The person carrying him let go and leaned him against the wall, letting him sink to the floor. Light could feel the warmth of them sitting nearby. Heat flared in his chest. _Wait... Who was carrying me?_

Light finally managed to open his eyes. L was crouched on the floor next to him, his wide, shadowed eyes watching him with a strange curiosity.

"L?"

"It's okay, Light. It's just the shock. Stay calm, you just need to lie down for a while."

"L, I-"

"Hush. You don't have to explain anything. I can understand. It's okay."

"What... what happened?"

"I can't be sure, exactly." L stayed there, watching Light with his dark, inquisitive eyes. Light wanted to reach out to him, but his head was warped enough without having to deal with the hot, fluttery rush inside him. He wasn't sure how long he stayed there, staring into space, trying to get a grip and bring himself back to reality, L sitting there next to him. So close to him it hurt.

Eventually Light felt strong enough to stand. He dragged himself off the floor and staggered to his feet. The second he was up, his head went dizzy and he swayed forward, black spots clouding his vision. He felt hands reach forward and flatten against his chest, catching him. His vision cleared. It was L, right in front of him, his face just inches from Light's.

"You're still unstable. Maybe you should stay up here for a while longer."

Light shook his head and sighed. "You're right. I should take a rest."

Neither of them moved. L stayed where he was, his hands still resting against Light's chest, even though he stood perfectly fine on his own now. Light's heart raced, his eyes staring into L's, the dark, stormy pools of mist gazing back at him. He reached a hand up and rested it against L's neck. He didn't move, only stood there in front of Light, motionless.

Light couldn't take it anymore. His hand moved up from L's neck and cupped itself around the edge of his face. L stared up at him. "Light?"

He didn't speak. Light leaned forward, tilted L's head back, and their lips met.

For a second, everything froze. It was as if time had stopped. Light couldn't feel anything, only the warmth of L's hands on his chest, his lips against his own. Then...

L stiffened. Light felt him starting to shiver. His hands pressed harder against Light. His breathing quickened. He let out a small, choked sound. "Mmm-"

Light opened his eyes. L pushed his hands against Light again and turned his head, breaking up the already awkward kiss. Light abruptly let go of L and watched as he pulled back, gasping, his eyes wide. Light stared back at him, unsure of what had just happened.

L took a step back. His eyes were huge. Scared. Light could see that he was shaking. "L," Light murmured. "L, I-"

"No," L said, cutting him off. "Light, just... No."

Without another word, L turned away and walked back to the stairs, leaving Light alone to wonder what the hell he had just done.


	10. Chapter 10

**This story just passed 100 views! Guess that means it's time for another update. Did you enjoy the yaoi? No? Then shut up.**

**Don't like my pairings? Don't read my story. The yaoi only gets better.**

**Now, then...**

More Than Alive- Chapter 10

_Etheria's wings were burning. She couldn't fly much further. She could feel her shoulders weakening, but the gritted her fanged teeth and pushed harder. It didn't matter if she died like this. If she slowed down even a bit, she would only be sealing her fate. Rega wouldn't be far behind. He knew what she'd done. He would kill her, then he would tell everyone about the human girl she had been hiding in the glen. Then little Sara would die as well._

_A bloodcurdling roar thundered across the rocky cliffs. He was close. Etheria pumped her wings harder, ignoring the agonizing ache. Suddenly a sharp pain tore through the thin, leathery skin of her outstretched wing. She let out a startled cry before shuddering to a stop and plummeting to the ground below. She landed roughly upon the rocks. Etheria twisted her head to look up, only to see a huge, dark shadow soaring down..._

"FATALITY."

"God dammit!"

"Yes! Yesss! I won! I won, bitches! Suck it, Matt!"

Light dropped the book he held in front of his face, letting it drop and fall open into his lap. He looked up at the common room tv, where the backdrop of Mortal Kombat was displayed on the glowing screen, FATALITY splashed across the image in dripping red letters. In front of the tv, Matt was sitting cross-legged on the floor, one hand holding a controller and the other slapped against his forehead. Mello danced around him, laughing, her controller sitting on the floor where she had dropped it.

"Yes! Hell yes! I am the master!"

"Oh my god, Mello, shut up." Matt sprang up and grabbed Mello by the waist, dragging her back to the floor. The blonde squealed and playfully beat her fists against Matt's shoulders.

"Come on. You're just upset because you got beaten by a girl."

"Mello, it was one game." He laughed. "And you are damn hardcore for a girl."

Light glared at the two younger hackers. "Would you two cut it out? I am trying to read here."

Mello and Matt both looked over their shoulders at Light, who was, as usual, sitting couch with one of Rinn's hundreds of dragon fantasy novels in his hands. He wasn't sprawled or curled up, like the others always were in their spare time. He was sitting straight up in his place, as if he were in school.

Matt let out a sharp laugh. "Okay, okay,_ professor_. We'll keep it down."

"Hey, I've got a better idea," Mello said, pulling herself off the floor. "Why don't you come and join in for a few rounds? We've got two more controllers. It'll be fun."

Light sighed. "I'm not really into video games."

"Why not?" Matt mused, spinning around to face his straightlaced crewmate. "Come on. You're always so serious. Just one round, and if you hate it, I won't ask you to play again."

"Really, guys," Light said flatly. "I'd rather just stay here. Video games aren't... well, they're not my thing. I never played them much. I'm not interested, okay?"

Mello cocked her head and looked up at Light. "Okay, what is it?"

"What are you talking about?"

"You're always like this. You're all stiff and serious all the time. It's weird."

"What? No it's not. I'm just-" Light trailed off.

"Seriously," Matt said. "It's like you've never had fun a day in your life. You're not Kira anymore. We're not jacked in, and there's nothing we have to do right this second. It's a free world, Light. Learn to relax." He turned back and picked up his controller, sliding his goggles back into place from where Mello had knocked them askew. "You up for another round, vamp?"

Mello snuggled up next to him and picked up her controller. "Only if you're ready to get your ass kicked again."

Light looked down at the two of them as they returned to the menu screen, selected new characters and began another game. He looked back at the novel lying open on the couch next to him._ I guess that fight with Rega can wait._

Light watched as the battle ensued between the two gamers. It was kind of entertaining to watch, Matt's precise focus, Mello's button mashing tactics, the both of them shouting out when either of the characters on the screen got hurt, missed a crucial strike, or landed a decisive move. Light laughed. This was hilarious.

"FATALITY."

"Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Second win, BITCH!"

"What? Again? Dammit, you learn fast!"

Light got up from the couch and moved over in front of the tv to settle down next to the two of them. "Hey. Think I could give it a try?"

Matt turned around, smiling. "So now you want to play?"

Light shrugged. "What? It looked like fun."

"Knew you'd come around eventually." Mello handed her controller to Light. "Go easy on him, okay Matt?"

"I'll try." Matt grinned back at her and returned to the menu. He let Light choose a character and gave him a quick runthrough of their abilities. Then the battle went on. It wasn't even five minutes before FATALITY had once again been splashed across the screen.

"What?"

"Wow."

"You really suck at this, Light."

Light placed the controller on the floor and sat back. "Well, I tried."

"See? Wasn't so bad, was it?" Matt said, handing the second controller back to Mello.

Light laughed softly. "Yeah, I guess you were right."

Light watched as Matt and Mello started up another game. As the fight dragged on, he got lost in his thoughts._ Maybe they have a point. Maybe I really have been a bit too serious._

0o0o0o0o0

The holodeck was filled with the usual low buzz of everyday activity. Light watched from a corner of the room as L, Rinn and Matt read through the files on Near that they had collected two days earlier. The Task Force had collected a lot of information, and it had taken longer for them to get through all of it than they would have liked.

Light's eyes drifted to L. He once again found himself staring at the dark-haired detective, the one who had freed him and sent him spiraling into this mess. The one who had stirred up those strange feelings. They were still there. In fact, they never left. Not after what he'd done.

L had been unusually shaky around him for the past few days. It was no wonder. Light had put him through hell He'd been hated, abused, threatened, _murdered_- then Light had kissed him. Kissed him right on the lips. If that couldn't scare the absolute hell out of someone, he didn't know what could.

L suddenly looked over his shoulder. His clear, stormy eyes immediately registered Light's appearance. "Can I help you?"

_Damn it. He knew I was staring._

"Um... I was just... I was reading the file. I mean, I should know what's going on between the Task Force and Near too, shouldn't I?"

L nodded. "Good point," he said flatly, turning back to the file. _He won't even speak to me._

Light tore his eyes off of the back of L's head and focused on the file. There was no point in trying to remedy the situation between him and L. There was no way he'd accept his apology for... for..._ I don't know. Kiss rape?_

A whisper caught Light's attention. He'd finally managed to turn his thoughts to the file in front of him, and now he was distracted all over again. Light kept his eyes on the file, but he strained to hear the hushed conversation going on right in front of him. The whispers went on, and eventually Light couldn't take it any longer. He stole a quick glance at the others at the control panel. Rinn was silent, still reading obliviously through the file. His gaze flickered to the blaze of blood red hair leaned in next to a spray of black. Matt was talking with L. The whisper sounded again. L nodded slowly, then there was another whisper.

Matt's head moved, and Light's eyes flickered back to the screen. He didn't want to get caught staring again. The fact that he was standing in the same room as L was awkward enough. He stared intently at the text, trying to force thoughts of the kiss out of his head.

_It was one time... I didn't mean it... It wasn't serious... It didn't mean anything..._

"Light?"

Light's eyes widened. "Huh? What?" He tore his gaze away from the file. Matt had turned around to face him, his goggles perched on his forehead to reveal inquisitive dark blue eyes. L had turned around as well. Light's palms went cold. "Oh. What is it?"

"Matt's noticed that your behavior has been a little strange lately," L said.

Light nodded. His heart was thudding in his chest. _Oh god..._

Matt nodded. "Yeah. You're always so rigid, and I thought that maybe something was up."

_Oh no. Oh god no. Don't say it. Please don't say it._

"Your stress levels haven't seemed to change since your arrival in the real world, despite the fact that you don't have many of the pressures that you used to. Granted, there are some new ones, but not nearly as many as there used to be. So Matt was thinking, maybe..."

_No. No, no, no, no, no, no..._

"Maybe you're still hanging onto that stress."

Light's pulse slowed back down. _What?_

Matt looked pointedly at Light. "I've been talking it over with Mello, too. Everybody agrees. You've been acting way more strained than normal. And I was just thinking that maybe you were still thinking of the life you had in the Matrix, and, well, we all know what that was like."

Light's mind stuttered at the accuracy of Matt's diagnosis._ Wow. You are good._

"Okay, maybe I have been a little serious for what you're used to," Light admitted, nonchalant. "Maybe that's just how I am. What's your point?"

Matt flashed a sly smile. "Mello and I were planning to, well... help you let go."

Suspicion nudged its way into Light's thoughts. "What do you mean?"

There was a pause. Matt grinned. "Have you ever been to a rave, Light?"

Light opened his mouth to protest, but L cut him off before he could speak. "Now before you get any ideas, Light, I want you to listen to Matt. He's just trying to help."

Light sighed. "Alright," he said. "I'm listening."

"Okay. This is the plan," Matt began enthusiastically. "It's only for one night. Me and Mello know this place in the middle of Tokyo. It's called Netherworld. The place is completely underground. We used to sneak out and go there all the time before we broke free. I can get us in for free, and it's never insanely crowded, purely because no one knows about it. And don't worry, the security there is pretty selective, so minimal drugs and nothing weird going on. If you hate it, we can leave. No pressure, and we'll go whenever you say you can't take any more. How's that sound?" The redhead's eyes shone with excitement.

Light thought it over for a minute. "Um..." he murmured, "You sure you're okay with this, L?"

"They're 21, Light," L said. "They've been through this before. I'm sure they know what they're doing."

"Come on," Matt implored. "You don't plan on being a tightwad all your life, do you?"

Light growled under his breath. "You're really set on going through with this, aren't you?"

Matt shrugged and smiled shyly. "Well... What can I say? I'm compassionate."

Light sighed. "Okay. I'll do it. Just this once."

0o0o0o0o0

Light was opened his eyes to find himself in an alleyway, hidden between the thin metal walls of a payphone. Outside, the city lights of the Tokyo streets flashed bright against the night sky. Light placed the phone back on its cradle and stepped out into the light. He felt different. Something was amiss. Light looked down at himself. He gasped. His outfit had changed completely.

"Kira-kun!" A high, spirited voice echoed out of the darkness. A slender, strong hand grabbed his arm. Light whirled around to see Mello, or at least someone who looked like her. He could hardly recognize her behind the black and green streaks in her hair and the multicolored smudge of shadow around her dark eyes. She drew herself close to him, grinning. "I can't believe you actually agreed to this."

Light looked down at the new outfit that Mello and Matt had chosen to blend him in with the ravers. Bleach-splattered black skinny jeans, a tight vintage comic tee, bright blue high-top converse and at least 30 bracelets covering his arms, all topped by a neon green jacket with checkered sleeves. Light could feel that his hair had been spiked and was probably colored as well. He laughed awkwardly. "Neither can I."

"This is going to be EPIC. Trust me, you will not regret this." Mello herself looked like a survivor of the rainbow apocalypse. She wore black converse knee-high boots, neon pink fishnets, dark gray cutoffs, a seamless Sleeping With Sirens shirt, and a cropped leather jacket, her arms underneath coated with bracelets. Her hair had been altered from its smooth blonde cap into feathery layers, streaked with green and black, a fringe of bangs falling just above her eyes, which were dusted with a rainbow of color and lined with black kohl.

"I certainly hope not," Light murmured to himself.

A laugh drifted out from the darkness. "Nice job with the outfit, Mello." Matt's voice. Light watched as he stepped out of the shadowed alleyway. He wore a broken-in striped shirt under a black vest covered in unnecessary electric blue zippers, his signature fingerless gloves and tinted goggles, fade-dyed turquoise skinny jeans and combat boots. Even over the long sleeves of his shirt there were rows of cheap rubber bracelets.

Light pulled back the sleeve of his own jacket to look at the small arsenal of colorful bands that rubbed against his skin. "What's with all the bracelets?"

"It's a raver custom," Mello said. "I'll explain it to you when we get to the Netherworld."

Matt walked towards the two of them. "Remember what I said. If you don't want to go through with this-"

"You know what?" Light shot back suddenly, cutting him off. "Screw it. I don't care what happens at this point. Let's just get this over with before I change my mind."

The two younger hackers grinned at each other, their eyes lit with excitement. Mello grabbed Light's arm again. "Come on, then. Let's get this started."

The walk to Netherworld was fairly short. They had jacked in only a few blocks away. The entrance to the club didn't look like much at all. It was nothing but a decorative metal door, spray painted with black flowering vines, a black lighted sign hanging above. A silver moon glowed against the inky dark background of the sign, the name _Netherworld_ in pale blue gothic script stenciled overtop of that. There was hardly anyone gathered around the entrance, only a few people dressed the same as Light and his captors, and a pale-skinned security guard watching the door. He eyed the three of them suspiciously as they approached the club entrance. He opened his mouth to speak. "I'm going to need to see some ID-"

Matt pressed a finger to the man's forehead. His eyes glazed over and his breath caught, then returned to normal not a second later. He watched nonplussed as the three rebels walked through the door and into the club's entranceway.

Past the entrance was nothing but a dark hallway, lit by the dim purple glow of black lights. White designs of twisting vines, scattered cracks and strange tribal designs glowed green against the dark, velvety walls. Light's heightened senses picked up faint vibrations rising up from the floor, pulsing from the room below. _Wow. Matt was serious. This club really is underground._

The hallway came to an end. Flickering golden torch light lit up a stone-walled stairwell, a black metal spiral staircase rising up from the floor below. As they descended the pulse grew stronger, an earthquake of sound shaking the foundations of the building. Light heard strains of electronic melodies leak through the walls, growing stronger as they drew closer. The staircase ended, and they were standing in a small room, facing a soundproof door, another gothic bouncer standing guard. He offered a fanged smile and opened the door. "Welcome to the Netherworld," he said in a cold, sugary voice.

The door opened. Light could have collapsed from the sensory overload.

It was like hitting a wall made of sound. Blasting bass shattered the air, laced with bursts of bright electronic noise and synthesized melodies with strains of auto-tuned vocals shining through. Blinding lights flashed and spun in time to the music, lighting up the pitch-black room in a flickering, pulsing rainbow. Matt and Mello pushed Light into the crowd. The entire room smelled like people, sweat, perfume, intoxicatingly hot despite the low hum of air conditioning vents scattered throughout the room running at full blast.

Light found himself drowning in a human sea. Movement pulsed all around him, other dancers moving in time with the music, pushing him in random directions and no one seeming to care. The deafening music blasted against Light's eardrums. His brain lost all focus. Light froze, standing in the middle of the crowd, unsure of what to do next.

Light felt a hand come to rest on his back. A whisper of a voice rose above the music. "Hey. You alright?"

Light spun around. It was Mello. Matt was pushing his way through the crowd not far behind. Mello spoke again. "I asked you a question. Are you doing okay?"

"I don't know," Light said. Somehow, despite the earthshaking music, Mello seemed to hear him perfectly. "It's just... What do I do now?"

"You dance," Matt cut in, slinking up behind Mello. "Just let the crowd move you. Then the music takes over and... boom. You're golden."

Light took a deep breath and tried to relax. He closed his eyes and listened to the pulse of the music, letting the people around him sway and shift him around on the floor. His pulse slowed, his breathing deepened. He was so close to letting go, then-

Light's eyes snapped open. _Damn it._ The crowd had been pushing him all over the place. He was so sure that he'd moved. He was still in the same spot in the middle of the floor. Matt and Mello had let the music take them over and were dancing along with the rest of the gathering. Suddenly Mello paused. She glanced over her shoulder and her dark eyes fixed on Light. She turned towards him and slipped over to him. She placed her hands on his arms. "Still not getting into it?"

Light shook his head. "I'm sorry, I just can't- I don't know- lose focus, I guess?"

Mello smiled. "Here. Let me help you out." She took Light's hands in her own. "Now relax. Let go of everything and just listen to the music."

Light breathed in as Mello started to sway. The music filled the air and swarmed into his head. The blonde leaned her face next to his ear and whispered. "Now follow my lead."

Then she was dancing. Her eyes were closed, false-lashed lines of dark, smudged kohl on her serene face. She raised her arms above her head and swayed with the music, rolling her shoulders and shaking her hips as if it were the most natural thing in the world. At first, Light could do nothing but watch, mesmerized by her dance, the smooth, flowing movement of her arms through the air and her hips swaying from side to side. He closed his eyes and raised his arms above his head. He felt his focus starting to let go, slowly melting away into the deafening music and sporadic flashes of light. Then he was dancing as well, head tilted back as he moved to the pulse of the music surrounding him, hands clawing at the air, moving smoothly through the crowd like one of the fish in this sea of light and sound.

Before he knew it, Light had become one of the crowd. He stayed close to Matt and Mello, the three of them reaching out to each other every time the crowd pulled them apart. The ravers seemed oddly serene, held in a trance by the darkness, the music, and, Light suspected, probably a few other things as well. The crowd danced endlessly around them, reaching out and taking their hands, slipping off one of their bracelets or giving them one of their own as a sign of raver familiarity._ Oh. So that's what all the bracelets were for._

Light didn't know how long he was there. Time seemed to fade away as he moved through the crowd, dancing, oblivious to everything except the music and the glare of the rainbow lights, sinking into it like a soft, dark ocean. Eventually Light found himself growing tired. He looked through the surrounding crowd to find Mello and Matt. _There._

The two young hackers were pressed close against each other, staring deeply into each other's eyes, still assimilated into the spellbinding dance of the crowd. Light turned away and began to push his way through to the edge of the sea of ravers. _I could just take a break. I wouldn't want to drag them out of here just yet._

Light managed to pick his way through the writhing crowd until he reached a clearing, a few feet of space between the dance floor and the wall. Cool, uninhabited air washed over him, and he took a deep, grateful breath. A few of the tired-out ravers were leaned against the wall as well, wallowing in front of one of the air-conditioning vents or making their way down toward the DJ booth to make a request or the small glowing bar against the wall for a drink. Light leaned against the wall and took a few gasping breaths, his entire body aching from the endless dancing. His eyes wandered through the crowd, taking in all the other ravers who had left the crowd. Then one in particular caught his attention. A flash of memory flooded his brain._ I know her._

She was leaning against the wall with a sort of angelic charm, despite the fact that she looked depressed and dead-tired. She was wearing a gothic-lolita dress, black fishnets, and shiny black schoolgirl heels. Her shoulder-length, golden-blonde hair fell straight, except two small sections between her soft bangs and the rest of her hair, which were tied up into tiny pigtails with black satin ribbon. Silver jewelry glittered against her shadowed throat and wrists. Her innocent brown eyes were trimmed with long, dark lashes and lined with glittering black shadow.

Suddenly her eyes lifted up from the floor and looked ahead. Her gaze fixed instantly on Light. Something in her face lit up with surprise. _Yes. I definitely know her._

Memories of his past like came rushing into Light's head like a tidal wave, drowning out the music and filling his mind with thoughts of the Kira case, the death note, everything. And her...

He remembered her.

_Misa._


	11. Chapter 11

More Than Alive- Chapter 11

Misa.

It was her. She was alive. Light couldn't believe it.

L had told him what had happened in the virtual world after he left. Misa had been heartbroken. She refused to give an interview, didn't want her picture taken, avoided any publicity of any kind. Then the news broke out. Misa was found, broken on the pavement, at the base of a thirty-story building, traces of mascara still running down her cheeks. The budding supermodel was dead.

But she wasn't. She was here, at Netherworld, her sweet brown eyes fixed on Light from across the room. He couldn't move. The shock was too strong. So she made the first move. Misa took a step forward and walked toward him, closing the gap between them. She was right in front of him, looking up at him, gazing into his soul. "Light?" she whispered.

That voice. He remembered the sound of it, high-pitched and sugarcoated. He thought he'd never hear it again. And honestly, he'd hoped he never would.

"Misa?" Light breathed. "Is- is it really you? L told me... I thought you were dead."

"So did I," Misa said, her eyes glossy with tears. "After I heard about what had happened, I-"

"It's not true, Misa. None of it's true. But..." He placed his hands gently on her shoulders. "How did you find me here?"

"I- I-" Misa stuttered. A dark streak of running eyeshadow trickled down her cheek. "I missed you Light." She threw herself against him.

Light shuddered from the sudden impact. Misa was pressed against him, her cheek buried into the curve of his neck, a small, dark smudge forming on the shoulder of his jacket from her running makeup. Misa pulled her head back and looked up at him. Light couldn't move. Misa's head moved forward. She stood on her toes and pressed her lips to his.

For a second, shock and revulsion jolted up inside Light. He wanted to push her away, to make her stop, but he couldn't. Something was stopping him. He felt himself slackening, softening, melting into Misa's kiss. _I forgot what a good kisser she is._

Misa's arms wrapped around his neck, Light's arms were around her waist, his head bent to kiss her more easily. Through it all, he felt everything draining away, the hate, fear, stress...

Light gasped. Draining. Everything was draining away. He wasn't melting anymore. He was weakening. Something was sapping his strength. He could feel it. Light choked and gasped for air. His strength... his _life_... was getting dragged away from him bit by bit.

Misa. She was still there, her lips kissing his. Her mouth opened against Light's and she breathed in. Air rushed out of Light's lungs and he choked again. Her arms locked around his neck and held him closer, tighter...

_It's her. It's all her._

Light jerked his arms back from Misa's waist and slid them between their bodies, ignoring Misa's soft mewl when one hand accidentally grazed her breast. He finally found purchase on the slick satin of her dress and pushed her away. Nothing. Misa wouldn't move an inch. Light pulled his head back and gasped, trying to break up the kiss. She pressed forward and tightened her grasp on him. Light pushed harder. "M-Misa... w-what are you-"

"Shhh," Misa whispered, her face still dangerously close to Light's. "Just let it happen." She pushed forward again, her skinny arms holding Light captive. No matter how he struggled, Misa held him pressed against the wall, her manicured nails digging into his shoulders, slowly draining the life out of him through her sweet, deadly kisses. "Light..." she breathed. She kissed him again. "Light, I missed you... so much..."

"Misa... stop..." Light choked. He dug his fingers into the fabric of her dress. Energy built up inside him. _No. No, don't do it. It's not worth it. Please..._

Too late. The pulse fired. Energy went blazing through his fingers and speared through Misa's chest. She pulled back. Her eyes were huge, fearful, staring up at Light. Then she flew backward and crashed into the crowd.

A scream ripped through the air. The ravers stopped and backed away from the girl who had just fallen to the floor, making a small clearing in the pulsing crowd. She was lying on the floor, sprawled like a rag doll, her hair and dress scattered around her in a tragic mess. Her eyes fluttered open. They fixed themselves on Light and filled with tears. "Light... why?"

Light gasped, leaning against the wall. "W-what the hell did you do to me?"

Misa pulled herself up and sat on the floor, looking pitifully up at Light. "Light, why are you doing this?" she whimpered. "I- I just wanted... I was hoping that you would..."

"Misa?" Light stammered, still gasping for air. "Misa, are you..."

"I was only hoping... that you... would join them. With me."

Light's heart stopped. Fear seeped through him."What?"

"Light." Misa said his name again. "Light. It's not too late... To turn back."

"What do you mean? Misa, what do you want from me?"

"Light..." The blonde pulled herself to her feet, her face downcast. She looked up and smiled. "You know exactly what I want."

Light did know. But he sure as hell wasn't about to say it. He backed away from her until he felt his back pressed against the wall. "Misa... Misa, please, no..."

"Isn't it obvious Light? You already know. The Task Force sent me here. I knew you were coming because they told me. They thought that maybe I would be enough to convince you to side with us, because obviously your own _father_ wasn't enough."

"Misa, how did this happen? How did they even-"

"You weren't the only person to have touched a death note, Light. I should know. All those times you wiped my memory? How I was your little killing slave for all those years? It doesn't matter now, Light. I know everything."

"Because they told you, didn't they?"

"Yes. Of course they did."

"And now you're their weapon. Instead of me."

"And I've never been happier. Oh, Light." Her sugary smile fell into a vicious snarl. "You used me, Light. You used me like I was just another pawn in your stupid game."

Light opened his mouth to speak, but Misa took a step forward. The clipped sound of her heel against the floor cut him off. Misa's delicate hand wrapped around his neck. "I meant nothing to you," she hissed. Her fingers tightened, her nails digging icy scratches into his skin. "And don't you fucking dare tell me that things have changed."

Light jammed his hand between them and fired another pulse through Misa. This time when the force knocked her backward, she sank her nails into Light's neck and took him down with her.

_Bam._

Blood splattered onto the dance floor. The ravers were screaming. The music was gone. Light was on the floor, Misa straddled over him, her tiny fairy hands still clutching his throat. He stared up at her. Blood dripped onto his face. A small hole had appeared just below Misa's collarbone. Blood gushed from the wound and soaked into the satin of her dress. Her hands loosened and her vengeful expression changed to annoyance. Still kneeling over Light, Misa turned around to face the crowd. "Okay," she said, "Who fired that bullet?"

_What the hell? She's acting like it's nothing but a papercut!_

One person stood out from the crowd. Her honey-blonde hair glowed in the spectrum of lights. So did miniature silver pistol in her hand. Her dark eyes shone with anger. "Get. The hell. Off. Of. Him."

Mello. So she had come prepared.

Light struggled out of Misa's grasp, ignoring the tiny daggers of her nails in his flesh. It didn't matter. She had targeted Mello now. Misa rose from her knees and spun around to face the younger blonde. "What? This little bitch is here?"

Mello clicked her safety off and pulled the trigger again, but it was too late. Misa lunged forward and, in less than a second, had knocked the gun from Mello's hand and twisted her arms behind her back, one delicate, lethal hand at her throat. "W-wha-" Mello choked. Then Misa's nails sank into the soft flesh of her throat and she fell silent.

"Well, Light, what do you say?" Misa growled.

Light couldn't speak. He stayed frozen where he was. _Where the hell is Matt?_

"Light." Misa tightened her grip on Mello's throat. A trickle of blood surged up around the razored edge of her nails. "I asked you a question. What'll it be? Will you join me or not?"

Mello was trembling in Misa's grasp, her eyes huge with fear. More blood leaked from under Misa's nails. She shuddered and let out a tiny, pained gasp. Her slender legs collapsed and she slumped back, leaned weakly against Misa. "Come on, Light, she can't wait all day," Misa said, smiling coldly. "Either you agree to come with me, or you'll have a lot of explaining to do when you get back to L."

Light finally found his voice. "L- let her go, Misa. I'm the one you want. She has nothing to do with this."

"Oh, but she's just such a pretty bargaining chip." Mello cried out again. A tear rolled down her cheek, leaving a trail of dark, smudged colors. Her eyes fluttered. _She's killing her. She can't hold out much longer._

Light frantically scanned the crowd for Matt. His heart jolted. A flash of red. Then it was gone. Another pained gasp from Mello snagged Light's attention and turned him back to Misa. "We both know that I can't turn back, Misa. I'm not joining you."

"Light," Misa whimpered. "That's not true. You can always come back."

"L-light..." Mello choked. "P-please... don't... listen..."

"I won't do it," Light said. He stared straight into Misa's heartless brown eyes. "I don't care what you do to me. I will never join you."

"Oh." Misa's words were whispered. She looked disappointed, sad, wistful even... Then it was gone. Her icy anger returned. "Then you'd best say goodbye-"

"LET HER GO, YOU SOULLESS COMPUTER BITCH!"

A boy burst from the crowd and hurled himself at Misa. A flash of blood red. It was Matt.

Everything became a blur. A pocket-sized blade ejecting from Matt's glove. Misa shrieking. Blood. Mello falling to the floor and crawling toward the bar. Matt grappling with Misa. Shattering glass. Spilling liquid. Fire. Smoke. The entire club falling into disarray._ Molotov cocktail? Good call, Mello._

Someone grabbed Light's arm. Matt was shouting over the discordant noise. "Light! Light, snap out of it! We have to get out of here!" He was gripping Light's sleeve, fear in his twilight-blue eyes. Mello was leaned on his shoulder, weak, her eyes half-closed.

Light didn't even think. He spun around and made a break for the door. He heard screams and thuds all around him. He threw a glance over his shoulder and immediately wished he hadn't.

The room was slowly filling with smoke. The fire blazed across the bar as employees tried desperately to kill the flames. Misa, her right eye torn by a deep scratch from Matt's knife, was pushing her way toward them, shoving past everyone in her way, and everyone she touched... Light didn't know what he was seeing. Misa's hands took hold of a young candy raver who couldn't have been older than 18. She gripped the girl by the shoulders and threw her roughly aside. She fell limply to the floor and didn't get up. Just like the rest of the people lying in Misa's path. _Dead. They're all dead._

Light turned and pressed his hands against the door, throwing it open. He rushed through, Matt close behind. They sprinted up the stairs and through the entrance hallway. Light slammed the outside door open and held it for Matt, who was carrying Mello. She clutched weakly at the hood of his vest, her head leaned on his shoulder, just barely conscious. They had managed to clear a few thousand feet before a flood of panicked ravers came pouring out. Light and Matt kept running, knowing that Misa wouldn't be far behind.

It wasn't long before Light heard a faint click against the pavement. Misa's pretty shoes didn't seem to affect her ability to chase down prey. She'd caught their trail, and it wouldn't be long before she would catch up.

Light glanced over at Matt. The hacker was struggling to keep up. His breath was fast and heavy, and Mello's added weight was making it harder for him to keep running at top speed. Guilt stabbed at Light's heart. Matt couldn't go on much longer. If he fell behind, there would be Misa, waiting for them, then him and Mello...

Light stopped. "Matt. Hold on."

The younger hacker hesitantly slowed down, staggering to support the dead weight of the girl in his arms. "What's going on?"

"Go on without me."

"What?"

"You heard me, Matt. I'm going to slow down. I want you to run ahead and split off in a different direction. Get Mello out of here and jack out without me. I'm the one that Misa wants, and I'll hold her back for as long as I can. I'll meet up with you on the ship."

"Light, she'll kill you."

"No, she won't. Not if I can help it. Now go."

Matt sighed. "I hope you know how much I hate you right now. Good luck with your noble suicide." He turned and sprinted away, disappearing around the bend of an intersection.

The heel clicking grew louder. Light steeled himself and stood in place, unmoving, as Misa came closer and closer. He wouldn't let her take him now. He didn't want to face her like this, but he there was nothing he could do.

"Light!" He heard her voice in the distance. She was calling for him. "Light, please! Come back!"

_Like hell I will._ Light broke into a run.

"Light!" Misa was screaming. She wasn't the soft, lovesick girl he remembered. Her desperation was replaced by blind fury. "Light! LIGHT!"

Ringing broke through the noise that flooded Light's head. His head twitched to the left, following the sound. There. A glass phone booth stood next to a nearly deserted store that had closed for the night. Light dashed towards it. Then a weight crashed into him and forced him to the ground, slamming his head against the pavement.

Light flipped over and planted his hands against Misa's collarbone. A wave of energy pulsed through him and hit Misa with all the force Light could manage. Nothing happened. She was still there, leaning over him, a vicious, fanged smile on her pretty face.

"W-why doesn't it... work on you?" Light gasped, trying to catch his breath.

Misa laughed. It was like no sound that Light had ever heard before. He remembered Misa's laughter as girlish, high-pitched, annoying even. Not this. This was cold, hateful, piercing him like a shard of ice. "Of course it doesn't work. You stop hearts, don't you?"

Light stared up at her, shocked. "W- what do you..."

"Don't you see it, Light? Thanks to you, I no longer have one."

Misa's nails dug into Light's shoulders. He gasped. The weakening. The draining. The pain. Light closed his eyes. He couldn't escape this time. It was over. It was all over...

No. No it wasn't.

The feelings were all there. Weakness. Pain. Everything else. Everything except dying.

Light opened his eyes. The payphone was still ringing. He could still escape.

A new energy bubbled up inside him. Light twisted around, freed himself from Misa's grasp and threw her off of him. He dragged himself to his feet and staggered toward the phone booth. He slipped inside and slammed the door shut.

"LIGHT! NO!"

Misa threw herself at the door. She slammed against it, shaking the flimsy glass walls. Light pressed his back against the opposite wall of the booth, reaching desperately for the phone. The furious blonde clawed at the glass and screamed at Light. "No! No, stop it! Stop!"

He grabbed the receiver off of its cradle and held it to his ear. _Come on... Come on..._

Misa slammed her fist against the glass window. It splintered under the impact. "Light!" she screamed one last time.

The glass shattered. Then everything faded out and went dark.


	12. Chapter 12

**YAOI WARNING! MAY CAUSE FEELS!**

More Than Alive- Chapter 12

It was nearly 2 am. The Tempest crew should have been asleep, wasting time, lying around doing nothing, or anything other than hanging around the holodeck and panicking. Rinn had alerted the two remaining crew members of the incident with Misa. Light, Mello and Matt had returned slightly less than an hour earlier, Rinn watching their entire frightening experience from the control panel touchscreen. They were scared and shaken, but alive. Now the entire crew was together, and no one felt like sleeping anymore.

"What the hell happened in there?" Ever was the first one to speak.

"I- I don't know," Matt said. "I can't even be sure how Misa got there, or why. I thought she was dead. But apparently, she's become a program and has joined the Task Force, the same thing that would have happened to Light if we hadn't set him free."

"And that- that thing she does..." Rinn said quietly. "What is that?"

"None of us can figure out what that is," Light answered. "It seems that she can kill someone with a single touch. She can make it happen as quickly, slowly, or painfully as she wants. I remember she was... She was torturing Mello to try and make me join her."

"Mello." L finally spoke up. "You experienced all this firsthand. What happened?"

"I- I really don't know, I just..." Mello was sitting in one of the jack chairs snuggled close next to Matt, a blanket wrapped around her shoulders. Light could see that she was still shaking. "She had me pinned, her nails were digging into my neck, and I- I don't know. It didn't feel like anything I can explain. All I know is that it hurt. It was just like- Like my life was getting drained away. It just felt like... dying. Just dying and nothing else."

"Strange," L murmured. "She's able to kill with a single touch, the circumstances of the death can be manipulated to her will, and it occurs with no explainable circumstances, unlike Light's residual powers. She's obviously been altered from her human form."

A thought struck Light. "The file. I remember that it said that the Task Force had extracted the shinigami essence from Rem's ashes. They must have somehow grafted it into Misa."

Matt nodded, following closely. "And now Misa is..."

"She's a new breed of shinigami."

The room fell silent. There was nothing more to say. Light got lost in his thoughts. He remembered Misa when they had been together, when she had acted as the second Kira. It seemed so long ago now. She used to be so different. Misa's angelic, feral face. Her fierce, biting words. What she'd done to him, to Mello, that little rave girl and all those other people at Netherworld. She had changed. She would never be that frail, childish princess he remembered. That Misa was dead. This was what she was now.

Minutes ticked past. Eventually the room started to clear out. First Ever left, then Rinn, Matt with Mello leaning weakly on his shoulder. Soon it was only him and L. Light quickly got up and left before he did anything that he knew he would regret.

Light walked through the main corridor and to the staircase, his head reeling. He was tired. Too much had happened today. He didn't want to deal with anything more. He just wanted sleep. He dragged himself up the staircase and staggered to his room. Light shut the door and collapsed onto his bed. _Okay. No more thoughts. Only dreams now._

Light was lying on his bed, wide awake. He couldn't fall asleep now if he tried. It didn't matter how late it was, or the fact that he was tired enough to sleep for days. He couldn't sleep now. The second he closed his eyes, thoughts flooded his head. Feelings. Memories of everything that had happened over the past few days. Thoughts of Misa and the monster she had become. And L. Especially L.

At some point in the middle of Light's tossing and turning, the distant sound of soft footsteps rose up from the silence. Light froze. L was finally coming upstairs. Light listened as the soft barefoot padding drew closer, passed his door, and faded towards the end of the hallway. Then he heard L's door open and softly swing shut. The quiet returned.

Light rolled over onto his back. L was still shaky around him. He saw it in his eyes almost every time they were together. Ever since these feelings had come up, everything had changed between them. He had a strange feeling that they would never be the same.

Light couldn't help feeling a stab of guilt. He had no idea what L thought of him now. He seemed wary. Suspicious. Scared, even. He'd never apologized for what he'd done. He knew L would hate him regardless. And L had every right to hate him for what he'd done on top of everything else he had put him through.

Light sat up and pushed his covers back. L didn't sleep. He knew that. He wouldn't care if Light came to him in the middle of the night just to talk things over. With everyone else on the ship fast asleep, their secret would stay safe. Light knew he couldn't keep these feelings to himself forever. He had to say something.

Light swung his feet over the side of the bed, stood up and hesitated. He couldn't. Not to L. Not like this. It would seem strange. Light never stayed up this late. L would know something was wrong. Things were bad enough between them as it was. He couldn't...

_No. I have to do this._ Light reached for the door._ I can't keep holding this back._

Light slipped through the door and crept out into the darkened hallway. The silence seemed almost surreal. The faint bluish glow of a fluorescent night light kept the hallway from falling into pitch darkness. He looked toward the end on the hallway. A faint strip of light glowed from under the shadow of a door. L's room. He was the only one who would be awake at this hour. Light crept softly through the darkness toward the door.

He stopped for a second, leaning softly against the wall, something holding him back. It seemed so easy to knock on the door and ask for forgiveness. But for some reason, it wasn't. Light bit his lip. It was too late to go back now. He lifted his hand and tapped softly on the door. "L?"

Silence. He knocked again. "L? Are you awake?"

He heard the soft sound of movement inside the room. The latch clicked out of its place. The door slid open and a ribbon of faint light spilled through. L's pale face appeared in the doorway. "Light? What are you doing?"

Light took a deep breath. "I wanted to talk to you. About... um, what I did... a few nights ago."

"Oh. That." L's expression stayed blank. "What about it?"

"Is it alright if I come in?" Light whispered. "It's- It's a little awkward talking to you through a door."

"Oh. Sorry." L swung the door the rest of the way open and Light stepped inside.

L's room was nearly twice the size of Light's. It was painted a pale, icy blue, and was basically built the same as Light's, a simple cube with shelves set into the wall that were loaded with all sorts of books. A sliding-door closet was built into the opposite wall, its mirrored door shut and reflecting the images of the room. A simple bed with black sheets was pushed against the wall in one corner, a night-table cube sitting next to it, and a small metal desk was in another corner with a lamp and a laptop sitting open on the desktop. Light couldn't be sure exactly what he'd expected. Maybe a top-secret library. Or just one huge mess.

L moved over to the bed and perched himself on the edge. Light remained standing, leaning awkwardly against the wall, not sure where things would go next. L looked expectantly at him. "You wanted to talk?"

"Um, yes," Light stammered hesitantly. "I- I just wanted to apologize..."

"There's no need for you to be standing there like that," L said. It was as if he hadn't heard Light's words at all. He shifted over on the bed and patted the vacant space next to him, smiling shyly at his friend.

Not sure what else to do, Light walked across the room and settled onto the edge of the bed next to L. For a second, he didn't speak, only stared at the floor, trying to sort through the mess of thoughts swirling around in his head. "L, I... I don't know what to say."

L didn't look at Light either. He had his head turned away from him, looking at the floor as well. "What were you about to say before?"

"I just... I wanted to apologize. For what I did. It wasn't right. I shouldn't have put you on the spot like that. I just couldn't help it. I'm so sorry."

"The kiss, you mean?"

Light sighed. "Yes. I just- I don't even know. I was in shock, and I wasn't thinking straight, and then suddenly, there you were, and..."

"What are you saying, Light?"

"L, I- I think that I might-"

"You might have feelings for me?"

Light looked up and turned to face L, who was still looking at the floor. "L, how did you-"

Suddenly L looked up, turned around, leaned forward and kissed him.

Light froze. He had no idea what was going on. All he felt was a warm, fluttery surge in his heart, the warmth of L's lips pressed against his. It had all happened so fast. He opened his mouth to let out a tiny gasp of surprise. A sweet taste flooded his mouth. Light closed his eyes and breathed out. _What is this? What does it mean? I don't even-_

Then, as suddenly as it had started, it was over. L pulled back and Light took in a shocked gasp of air. He looked down at L, his face just inches from Light's. His eyes were wide and his face betrayed a small shred of happiness behind his shocked expression. Light struggled to speak. "L, I-"

"Light," L whispered. He ran his fingers over the curve of Light's neck. "I already knew how you feel about me."

"L, how could you have known all this time? You never said anything about this."

"I know. I was just... waiting. Waiting for you to confess how you felt. I could already tell, from the way you had acted every time we were close, even when we were handcuffed together. Your behavior around me was always the same. I could tell how you felt from the beginning. I was only waiting for you to admit it. But you never did."

Light thought back to their last night together, out in the rain, dripping wet in that empty stairwell. "Is that why you... acted like that... right before I killed you?"

L lowered his gaze. "I wanted you to know- to know that it was okay. I didn't care that you had feelings for me, and I would accept how you felt whether you were Kira or not. I had been waiting for months for you to confess your feelings. Only you saw yourself as so perfect and so righteous, you couldn't even admit your feelings to yourself."

"L..." Light didn't know what to say to that. He was right. He was right about everything. When he thought back to the year that he'd spent hating L, feeling threatened, plotting against him at every turn, there had been something else underneath all the hatred and fear. He hadn't known what it was, but it had been there all the time. It had nearly come out when he had brought L in from the pouring rain, when they were sitting together in the deserted stairwell and soaking wet. It was the feeling that L had called friendship, seemingly unaware of what it really was. It was what he had felt as he watched L freeze up, his voice choking out in mid-sentence, that second he knew there was no going back from what he had become. He'd felt it as he held L as his heart slowed, then stopped, as his eyes fell closed and he went limp in Light's arms. And now...

Light wrapped his arms around L and held him close. "Light?" he heard him whisper.

Light didn't say a word. He only stayed there, L pressed against him, heat flaring in his chest. His feelings were gone from his control. Tears burned behind his closed eyes. He buried his face into L's hair. "Thank you," he breathed.

He felt L's arms slip around him and return the hug. He shifted and curled up against Light, nestling his face into the curve of his shoulder. "It's alright. I just wanted to say... I..."

"What is it?"

"It's okay if you have feelings for me, because honestly, I think... I have them for you as well, Light."

L lifted his head to look up at Light. His dark grey eyes were gleaming in the dim white light of the desk lamp. Light gently swept his thumb over L's cheek. He lifted L's face to kiss him again. It wasn't awkward anymore. Now it just felt... right. More than anything else, it felt right.

"L?" Light whispered against L's lips.

"Mhmm?"

"Is it alright if I stay here tonight?"

"You mean you actually want to sleep in my room?" He sounded surprised.

"I sort of just... I don't know, poured my soul out to you. And now... I don't want to go."

L pulled back and rested his cheek on Light's shoulder. "Neither do I."

Light pulled back the covers of the bed and nestled himself into the softness of the sheets. He closed his eyes as he felt L crawl in next to him. He curled up against Light and rested his head on top of his shoulder. Light slipped his arm around L's shoulders, feeling nothing but his warmth, his soft, velvety dark hair, the faint sugary smell he gave off. Strange. He'd never noticed that smell before. It smelled like... safety. Safety and warmth. With L pressed close against him, Light drifted off to sleep.


	13. Chapter 13

More Than Alive- Chapter 13

When Light woke up the next morning, he didn't know where he was. The room he was in was larger than his own, ice blue instead of winter grey, the bed with a foot or two of extra space more than his did. And it was warm. So warm.

It took a second for Light's sleep-logged brain to remember the events of last night. He had no idea what time it was. He glanced toward a small digital clock on the night-table-cube next to the bed. 7:28. He'd had only a few hours of sleep. He closed his eyes and settled back under the covers to fall back to sleep. That was when he heard breathing next to him.

Light looked over his shoulder toward the soft, whispering sound. There was someone next to him. He could feel their warmth, the movement of their smooth, even breathing. Their face was buried in the blanket. Light tried to remember the previous night and why the hell he had ended up in one of his crewmates' rooms.

The stranger shifted in their sleep. Light felt an arm slip drowsily over his shoulder. The warmth grew stronger as a mess of black hair emerged from the covers, then a pale, peaceful face. L. He had been sleeping next to L.

Light slid back under the covers and softly slid his arm around L. He stirred and his breath quickened, but he didn't wake up. Light had never seen L sleep before. Of course, he had drifted off every now and again when they were working late, but he'd never seen him asleep like this. He'd surrendered completely and was lying comatose under the sheets, his long black hair scattered over the pillow, his insomnia-shadowed eyes closed. Light smiled. He looked strangely serene like this. Like some kind of dreaming dark angel.

L's eyes fluttered. He let out a small, sleepy moan and reached his hand up to rub his forehead. He pushed his curtain of hair back from his face and opened his eyes. The two deep, stormy pools registered Light immediately. A look of drowsy surprise crossed L's face at first, then the memories of last night melted it into a shy smile. "Hi."

Light laughed softly. "Morning."

L stretched his arms over the edge of the covers to encircle them around Light's neck. "You're still here. I swear, while I was lying there, I thought I was just imagining it. I thought that when I woke up, you'd be gone."

"No," Light said. "Of course not. Why would I do that?"

L didn't answer, only nuzzled his head against Light's shoulder and closed his eyes. Light ran a hand through L's soft, velvet black hair. Strange. He'd never thought that it would feel like this. "L?"

"Hm?"

"Why did you think I would leave?"

Light's dark angel sighed. "You're not the only one who has bad memories of your past life."

"Oh." Light laid his head back against the pillow. He thought about all the times he'd told L how he felt. He wasn't Kira anymore, but the memories of the things he'd done still haunted him, no matter how many times L told him things had changed. He knew that he couldn't be the only one who felt that way. The pain was still there. But it wasn't as strong as it used to be. It easily got wiped out by the warmth that blazed in Light's heart, the feeling of his fingers running through L's hair, his head resting next to his.

"Light?"

Light moved so that his forehead rested against L's. "Yeah?"

L wrapped his arms around Light and pressed himself close. He clutched at the fabric of Light's shirt and pressed his cheek to the curve of his neck. "Don't go."

Light took L's head in his hands and gently kissed his forehead. "Never."

0o0o0o0o0

"It's OTP. You can't argue with that."

"No way. It's been literally two days since then. How would you be able to tell already?"

"I heard him leave his room and go to the end of the hall. You weren't awake. You wouldn't have heard it."

"So?"

"I heard them talking, then the door opened..."

"And?"

"I fell asleep before I could hear him come back."

"That doesn't prove anything."

"But you can't tell me you haven't noticed." Mello's swivel chair rolled up behind Matt's, and she slipped her arms over his shoulders to stroke the soft polyester of his bleach-splattered shirt. She rested her head on his shoulders. "The way they act around each other. Not only that, Light's also gotten a lot better about the whole tightwad thing. That has to have something to do with it. L's been different too."

"Yeah, but that doesn't mean they're _dating_ or anything." Matt spun his chair around to face Mello and rested his bare feet on the edge of the cushion.

"Come on." Mello shot him a fanged grin, looping her fingers through the nubby-knitted blanket covering her bare shoulders. "Admit it. They are_ so_ in love."

Matt swiped at the blanket and tugged it off, leaving her exposed in nothing but a camisole and sweats. "Shut up, Blondie. And quit shipping the crew. It's weird."

"Hey!" Mello snatched her blanket back. "It's freezing in here. Give that back." She slipped the handmade blanket back over her shoulders. "Stop blowing holes in my ship."

"Okay, fine. It's your creepy hobby." Matt slid his foot forward and pulled his chair close to Mello's. "But if it doesn't turn out to be true, I told you so, okay?"

It wasn't the first time they had spent all night hanging out in the holodeck, doing nothing but killing time and watching the feed as it spilled over the control panel's extensive touch screen. It was almost always empty at this time of night. It left the two of them with an entire area of the ship all to themselves. They would spend hours here, doing whatever they wanted, until either someone interfered or one of them passed out.

"I'm just saying..." Mello murmured, watching Matt draw closer. "If you'd been watching them as closely as I have-" Matt leaned forward from his chair and crashed into Mello, shutting her up with a kiss. She laughed against his mouth and looped her arms over his neck. They stayed there, doing nothing but kissing for nearly five minutes, until the blanket slipped onto the floor and they had to stop and retrieve it.

"What are we even doing?" Matt laughed as he got up to get Mello's blanket.

"Same thing we do whenever this place is deserted for the night." Mello stood up and took the blanket from Matt. She draped it over her shoulders and extended her arms. "Come under my wings."

Matt laughed and ducked under her arm, wrapping the blanket around himself before sweeping her into a swivel chair next to him. "How's this?"

"Very comfortable, thank you," Mello said, snuggling herself next to Matt. "Hold on. I have an idea." She tapped an icon on the touch screen and opened the web browser. "There's this thing I've been meaning to show you-"

_Blip._

They were halfway through an image results page of Buffy the Vampire Slayer memes when the mainframe alert went off.

_Blip._

"What's this about?" Matt said, minimizing the image page. A tiny window had appeared in the corner of the screen. The border flashed red, faded, then flashed again. The small text displayed the nature of the warning.

_Blip. New message received. Sent from: unknown source._

"New message?" Mello unwound her arms from the blanket to reach the keyboard. "I wonder what it is." She tapped the tiny window, which expanded to its full size on the screen. The mainframe inbox appeared. A single message was highlighted in blue. Matt tapped the untitled message. Random, unreadable text filled the screen.

"What the hell is this?" Matt mumbled, confused. "It's nothing but static." He scrolled down. Nothing else but more text, random letters, numbers and symbols thrown together into some unreadable code. He activated the ship's translator. Nothing happened. The text remained encrypted.

"Can you trace the source of the message?" Mello asked.

"I can try," Matt said, tapping commands into the touchscreen. Another window appeared, a pale loading bar slowly filling with blue. The mainframe slowly worked its way to the source of the message. _Tracing... Tracing... Tracing..._

"It's from the Tokyo Institute," Mello whispered. She fell silent and thought for a second. "Have you been keeping up with that case Near was working on?"

"Yes, but I've been skipping out a little bit lately. He left the city a few days ago to get information from the suspect's hometown, where the victim was from as well." Matt pulled up another browser page. "I guess it's time that we checked it out again."

The page loaded. Matt typed in a seemingly meaningless web address and dug his way into Near's personal blog, kept secret from most of the world, other than his personal assistants. That majority did not include Matt. He'd hacked his way into Near's mission logs weeks earlier, when the project to set him free had begun.

The site loaded and journal entries began to spill onto the screen. Matt scanned the pages for the most recent entry. Mello began reading the page aloud.

"This crime had been very sloppily committed. With very little investigative effort, I have found that the suspect had at one time been friends with the victim, and had been betrayed by the victim for a scholarship, giving an entirely plausible motive. Other murder cases similar to this also had victims that had been related to this particular suspect. All victims were killed in a similar way, leading me to believe that emotional trauma has led the suspect to become a serial killer. I have returned to the Tokyo Institute-"

"He's back at the Institute," Matt said, cutting Mello off. "Do you think that it's from him?"

"We sent him the message along with the student files last week. There's no way he could have ignored it. He should know we're looking for him by now."

"Maybe he's sent a response."

"Then how come we can't read it?" Mello remarked, tapping the coded message on another window. "If this had been sent directly from him, it wouldn't make sense for him to have written it in code. He would have wanted us to get the of message, not sent some kind of unreadable puzzle."

"The Task Force must be interfering," Matt murmured. "If they had intercepted the message on its way to us, they would have been able to scramble the signals and send it on in an unreadable format, if not stop it entirely. Near must have found some way to override at least some of their defenses. There's only one thing that could mean."

"He knows the truth," Mello whispered. "Some of it, at least."

"Near wants to be set free."


	14. Chapter 14

**The story is almost finished! It seems so short now, doesn't it.**

**Warning: final chapters contain yaoi, blood and feels-triggering elements.**

**Read on.**

More Than Alive- Chapter 14

_I am their weapon now. And I've never been happier. You used me, Light. You used me like I was just another pawn in your stupid game._

Misa. She was so different from what Light remembered.

It had been three days since the disastrous rave. Now Light was back in the Matrix. That morning, the crew had been called to an emergency meeting in the holodeck. A message had been received from the Tokyo Institute late last night. Mello and Matt had been the only ones to see it. The message, which Mello had said was nothing but white noise anyway, had mysteriously disappeared overnight.

_The Task Force must be involved in this. If they've already found a way to interfere with our mission, then we don't have much time. We have to establish a connection with Near before it's too late. If we wait any longer, we'll never get the chance._

Sure enough, the crew had jacked in only a few hours later. Light was sitting on the counter of an empty storefront, the city cloaked in a mist of rain outside, the rest of the crew surrounding him. Ever, Mello, Matt and L. L. That was where he had fixed his gaze. L turned and their eyes met. A silent message passed between the two of them. Heat fluttered In Light's chest. He thought he heard a whisper from Mello, and his attention returned to the mission at hand.

"Alright." Ever spoke up and broke the thick silence hanging in the air. "According to Matt, Near has returned to the Tokyo Institute. Has he posted any updates since last night?"

"I just checked," Matt answered. "He hasn't made another entry."

"Good. Then he should still be there. If we can hack into the Institute's computer network, we can slip in a virus and establish a connection with him. Have you pinpointed his location?" Ever looked expectantly at L.

"Suite 564, sixth floor, building C," he answered immediately. "If we can work our way to specific connections, we can isolate the virus to his laptop, which should be plugged into the network for research. The Task Force may or may not be patrolling the campus, so we need to be careful. You all have your weapons on you?"

The crew nodded in unison. Light felt the now-familiar weight of his two black pistols housed inside the hidden pockets of his jacket, as well as the two clips of spare ammunition attached to his belt and the pocket-sized blade concealed in his sleeve. _Yeah, I'm set._

"It's best to be prepared to put up a fight," Ever continued. "I'll be going in first. I'll head up to Near's floor and keep watch there to make sure no one interferes. Matt, you need to find the moderator center for the Institute's network. I've sent you a map on your phone. Mello, you stay with him and watch his back. Once you've disabled security, send an alert to one of us."

"Light and I will be in the computer lab," L said. He shot a quick glance at Light. He'd set up the mission this way for a reason. "Once we receive your signal, we'll get a lock on Near's computer and infect it with the virus. On this mission, we can't risk the whole team being captured. The Task Force already has their eye on us, and they have a very powerful new weapon. Once you have completed your portion of the mission, you need to jack out as soon as possible. If you run into trouble, Rinn will send one of us a message and we'll come as quickly as we can and back you up. Otherwise, after you've finished your part, it's every man for himself."

A murmur of agreement circulated through the room. Then the crew split up and ran off.

After running several blocks in the rain, they finally reached the Tokyo Institute. For several minutes, Light followed L through the Institute's immense hallways, neither of them speaking a word. Eventually they reached a locked door, which was easily picked by Light, and opened to reveal a darkened room filled with row after row of long computer desks. The tiny plastic nameplate on the door read Computer Lab 23. A laminated paper was taped to the door just below it. _Closed for renovations._

Many of the computers in the lab had been disabled. L quickly located one of the few that still had a connection to the network. They turned it on and overrode the security login. The desktop screen appeared. Their work finished until Matt sent the alert, Light grabbed L by the collar of his jacket and planted a solid kiss on his lips. L didn't resist.

Only a minute later, Light's phone went off. A message from one of the crew. L reluctantly let go and Light checked his phone. It was a text from Mello.

_We've cut security. You're free to go. Have fun, lover boy. :)_

Light let out a soft laugh.

L smiled. "What?"

"Mello, that's what." Light grinned and handed his phone to L. "I think she's onto me."

L read the message and snickered. "What can I say? I've trained her well."

Light leaned over the computer and went to work breaking into the network's core. "Do you think she's said anything to anyone?"

"Matt, definitely," L said, pressing a few controls on his communicator phone. A USB port ejected itself from the phone's side, which L plugged into the computer's side. "She tells him everything. I can't be sure whether he believes her or not."

The network core was cracked. Light zeroed in on the MacBook in suite 564. "Word's going to get out soon enough. We can't keep this whole thing secret forever."

L opened the virus on his phone. "I know."

The virus file loaded onto the computer. Light entered the virus into the network and isolated it to the locked target. The virus shot through the system and imbedded itself into Near's laptop. The mission completed, L unplugged his phone from the computer. The USB retracted and he slipped it back into his pocket. He wrapped his arms around Light and kissed his cheek. "It's not the worst thing that we'd have to tell them."

Light looked into L's deep, storm-colored eyes. "So you think they'll take it just fine?"

"This isn't the world that you came from, Light." L twined his fingers through Light's smooth brown hair. "People here are different. There's no reason for them to drive a wedge between us." He placed a soft kiss on Light's nose. "It'll be okay."

"I hope you're right." Light pulled L close and gave him one last, heartfelt kiss. He knew that was as far as they could go for now. They had to get out before...

A footstep sounded outside the lab. Light snapped to attention. He ducked under the desk and L followed suit. He drew a pistol from a hidden pocket in his jacket. They both fell silent and listened for another noise outside.

More footsteps. They slowly grew louder as they approached the computer lab door. Another set of footsteps appeared, then another. Voices rose up from the muffled noise.

"You said you saw them come this way?"

"Yes. I've never seen them before, and they seemed suspicious..."

"... dressed in black, very strange..."

"Where is the key?"

The latch of the locked door clicked open. Light pressed himself against L and curled up further under the desk. The door swung open, and the voices became clearer.

"This lab was closed three days ago. No one, student or staff, is permitted entry." The voice was quiet, nervous almost. _Probably one of the employees._

"I think I know who it is you saw come through here." Another voice, this one deeper and vicious. _Task Force. Definitely a Task Force member._

"Alert the rest of security." Another member. "The residents of this building could be in danger. Get backup, but don't tell anyone else there is a threat."

"Understood." Another voice, a woman's, low and confident. _Just another security guard._

Light heard the hammer of a gun slide into place. The click of kitten heels broke through the suspenseful silence, followed by a high, sugary voice. "Let me go in first. I want to see the look on his face when he faces imminent death."

_Misa._

Light's breath caught in his throat. He heard L's breathing quicken next to him. He pressed himself closer and felt blindly along the floor for L's hand, his heart thudding against his ribs. L's warm fingers closed around Light's. Safety.

"I'll get us out of here," he whispered. "It'll be okay."

Light couldn't speak, only nodded weakly as Misa's heeled footsteps grew louder. She crossed through the doorway and began to search through the rows of computer desks. Light heard the sound of a deep intake of air, then a few short, breathy bursts. Misa made her way down the aisles, drawing slowly closer to where L and Light hid crouched under the desk. _Oh god, is she_... smelling _us?_

A pair of high-heeled black leather boots appeared at the end of their row. Misa took another step towards them. Another. Then she was running. She dashed towards the desks and ducked down on one knee, a black pistol held out in front of her. Her eyes swept the tiny area under the desk and locked onto Light. Cold fury burned behind the pools of sweet, chocolate brown, deadlier than arsenic. Her finger tightened on the trigger.

_Bam._

Suddenly, L had slipped out from under the desk and slid toward Misa. His foot collided with her hand, sending her gun flying. The shot missed, ricocheted off of the wall and crashed harmlessly to the floor. Taking advantage of the distraction, L landed another kick, this time on the side of Misa's head. The shinigami let out a childish yelp and smacked against the opposite desk. Light slid out after him, prepping his pistol. Misa twitched, then sat up and shook her head, trying to regain her senses. She locked her gaze on Light again.

"Don't let her touch you!" he shouted absently.

"Thanks, I'll make a note," L answered sarcastically. He sprang to his feet and made a break for the end of the row of desks. A shout from the Task Force agents, and bullets began to fly. Light ducked down and rolled out to the end of the row. He slipped around the corner of the next desk and took cover, crouching with his elbows braced against the desk, ready to return fire. A few shots back at the attacker, then he ducked back down. The gunfire began to quiet down.

Light heard a vicious snarl sound from somewhere behind him. He whirled around to see Misa prowling toward him, her pistol recovered and held in her hand. It didn't look like she meant to use it. With another bloodthirsty growl, Misa launched herself at Light.

He rolled back into a defensive position. Misa quickly evaded him and reached one lethal hand toward his throat. Light pressed the end of his pistol against her palm and fired. Misa shrieked and reeled back. It didn't matter how indestructible she was. She still didn't take pain well.

Light had a few precious seconds to escape. He scrambled to his feet and leaped over the desks and into the next row. The gunfire started up again. He felt a bullet graze over his shoulder, leaving a hot, stinging wound. He gritted his teeth against the pain and dropped to his knees. He crawled toward the other end of the row of desks. Misa wouldn't be far behind him. Three more rows, then he could get to the door and escape. Light dragged himself to the end of the row. Footsteps. The Task Force was no longer standing by the door, where they knew it was safe. One set grew steadily louder. The other fell short and was replaced by the sounds of a desperate fight. _L. Oh god..._

Light pushed the thought back. He couldn't help him if he was trapped down here. He reached the end of the row and jumped to his feet. He was met by another of the Task Force programs, this one with a strong build, narrow eyes and mousy hair. He raised one arm and aimed his gun at Light's forehead. Light's eyes widened. He flipped backward just as the shot was fired. The bullet flew past and struck the wall, just barely missing his face. Light hit the floor with a skull-jarring thud. He gasped. He'd lost his breath._ Not good._

The Task Force member shot again. Light rolled and twisted, struggling to avoid the bullets. They hit the floor, cracking the linoleum and sending shards flying. Something scratched Light across the cheek, traced another cut across his left leg, then stabbed into his hand as he struggled to push himself up from the floor and fight back. Then the bullets stopped. Light looked up at the program. He was out of rounds.

The program took a step forward. He had just less than a second. Light slipped his hand into his other hidden pocket. Just enough time. The Task Force program threw himself at Light. The sharp, narrow barrel of a pistol jabbed into his stomach. Light pulled the trigger. Blood splattered all over the walls. He was free to go. He had only a short time before the program would resurrect itself and go after him. He had to get to L.

Light gripped the edge of the computer desk and dragged himself to his feet. L was only two rows ahead of him. So close, but it seemed so far. He could still hear the sounds of struggle, L fighting desperately to escape. He was just barely holding out. Light retrieved his gun from the floor and ran for the next row of desks. An earsplitting shriek tore through the room. Something slammed into Light from behind.

Before he could even react, Light was on the floor, sharp nails digging into the sides of his neck. "Miss me, Light?" a vicious, syrupy voice hissed.

Small, powerful hands flipped Light over onto his back. Misa stared down at him, her delicate, lethal hands wrapped around Light's neck. She snarled, and her grip tightened. Light choked. Blood began to pour from the tiny, crescent-shaped cuts under Misa's fingers. She couldn't kill him with her powers, and she had resorted to this.

Light felt Misa's abilities starting to activate. The pain, the weakness, the horrible feeling of his strength being slowly drained away...

Realization hit. She couldn't kill him like this. She could take his strength. She could tear him down to size and fight him then. But she couldn't kill him. With a strained, desperate twist, Light managed to force his hands between himself and Misa. A pulse of energy built up in his chest and fired through his fingertips, sending Misa flying backwards. She hit the wall and whimpered. Light rolled over onto his stomach and crawled toward the row where L was. The sounds of fighting had gone quiet. _Don't be too late. Please don't be too late..._

L was pinned on the floor, bruised, bleeding, too weak to fight back. The Task Force program was leaning over him, hands around his neck. He was fading fast.

Light steadied himself, grabbed a pistol, aimed it at the program and fired. A hole burned its way through the side of his head and he fell down, temporarily disabled. L gasped for air. Light crawled in between the rows and dragged himself to L's side. He watched as he took in shallow, desperate gulps of air, trying to regain his senses. He stared up at Light, eyes wide. "L," Light said. He slipped his hands under L's shoulders. "L, are you ok?"

L's breathing began to slow down and eventually slipped into a normal rhythm. He weakly raised himself to a sitting position. "I- I think so," he stuttered.

Light slipped an arm around his waist and pulled him to his feet. "Come on. We have to get out of here," he said, pushing him toward the door.

A weak, puppyish moan sounded out from somewhere in the room. The sound faded, then was quickly replaced by a feral growl. Suddenly, there was Misa, bruises and cuts covering her skin, splattered in blood, crawling toward Light. She let out a shriek and lunged for Light's ankle.

L staggered up and broke into a run, Light sprinting after him. They crossed through the doorway and slammed the door in Misa's face before making a break for the hallway.

L and Light raced down the hallway toward the entrance where they had come in. It wasn't long before they both found themselves stopped dead in their tracks. Light heard a strange sound in the distance. Fast, heavy footsteps, growing clearer by the second. Security had finally arrived.

Light wasn't even sure what happened next. L grabbed his hand and turned around. They took off down the hallway, running back toward the computer lab. Panic flashed through Light's mind. They couldn't go back this way. The task force would be waiting. But he was already running. All he could do now was trust L.

The footsteps grew louder. The security backup was gaining on them. Light was trying desperately to focus, but panic kept firing in his brain, blocking it all out._ They're so close behind. I can't do this. We're going to get killed-_

Suddenly, L swung his arm forward. Light was thrown around in front of him. He slammed against a wall. "L, what the-"

Darkness.

Light opened his eyes. He was in another hallway. L had thrown him around a corner.

Light shook his head, trying to regain his senses. He looked around him. "L?"

The hallway was deserted. The footsteps had stopped. And L was nowhere to be seen.

Light froze. L was gone. He'd saved his life, then disappeared.

Light looked toward the end of the small offset hallway where he stood. There was a window at the end. A soft, deep gray light lit up the hallway. Rain poured down relentlessly outside. Without another thought, Light turned and ran to the window. A fire escape was hanging on the wall of the building outside, leading down another two stories before dropping off onto the street below.

Light pried the window open, kicked the screen out, and climbed out onto the fire escape. Rain fell from the dark gray sky, splashing against his face and soaking into his hair.

_You saved me, L. I won't let you down._

Light slid down the ladders and took off as the light of day slowly began to fade into dusk.

0o0o0o0o0

L raced down the hallway, heart pounding, breathing heavy, thoughts reeling. He'd left Light behind. He'd given him the escape route he needed. He knew that he had gotten out safely. But still, he'd left him behind.

L had known that they wouldn't both be able to get out that way. The security backup had been a straight shot down the hallway from them. If they had both gone through the offset, they would have been seen for sure. L had known he would he able to slip through the crowd of guards without getting caught. Light, though, he wasn't so sure of. So he'd thrown him towards the exit and turned back. He was sure that Light was still alive. So why did he feel like this?

_You abandoned him,_ he thought as he crossed through the doors of the Institute and lost himself in the crowd. Security was far, far behind him. He could definitely find an exit now. He reached into his pocket to get his phone. Rinn would set up another connection. He would get out safely, and so would Light. He had to have escaped. He had to.

_You left him, L. You left him for dead._


	15. Chapter 15

More Than Alive: Chapter 15

The rain continued to fall as Light dashed through the streets of Tokyo, putting as much distance between himself and the Institute as he could. No matter how he tried to focus, fear kept getting in the way. He had no idea where L was. It was strange. He'd thrown him into the offset, then disappeared. Why had security stopped chasing them? Light's lungs were burning as he forced himself to run further. _They caught him. He's dead. You didn't stop him._

The bright lights of the business district began to dim down. Light had made it into one of the few quiet spots in the massive city. He stumbled and skidded to a stop, his legs feeling like blocks of wood. He doubled over, panting. How far had he gone?_ I don't know. But way past where we came into this whole mess._

Eventually, Light forced himself to straighten up again. He couldn't just stand here. The Task Force was after him. He had to escape. He remembered Ever's orders at the beginning of the mission. _Once your portion is completed, it's every man for himself._

L couldn't have been captured. He knew he could save himself. That's why he had saved Light instead. He was probably out in the streets, searching for an exit site. Or even back on the ship, waiting for Light to show up.

Light ran a hand through his dripping hair. There had to be a payphone somewhere around here. He searched around in the dim, blue-white glow of the streetlights. There. In front of a closed store stood a single phone booth. How strangely convenient. Light reached into his pocket and wrapped his fingers around his phone. All he had to do was contact Rinn, and-

_BAM._

"Light Yagami!"

Light froze. That voice. It couldn't be.

He whirled around. Standing there, in all her soaked, bloodstained glory, was Misa. Gone were the prissy black boots she'd worn before. She was standing barefoot in the cold, rain-soaked streets. Streaks of mascara ran down her cheeks, whether from angry tears or raindrops, Light didn't know. She held the same pistol as before, her arm extended and aiming at Light. A cold fury burned brightly behind her sweet brown eyes.

"Misa..." Light whispered. "How did you-"

"I can't believe this, Light," she shouted over the rainfall. "I trusted you. I tried to join forces with you. I could have given you everything." She stepped closer. Light didn't move.

"You don't know anything about me, Misa. You don't know what everything means to me."

"Of course I don't." Misa sniffled and flicked a strand of hair out of her face. "I don't know that all you ever wanted was to wipe out the scum of this world and remake it as a safe place filled with honest, hardworking people. I don't know that you wanted to become a god. Now that I've become what you never will, I know even less than before."

Light knew he should run. He should raise a weapon, at the very least. But for some strange reason, he couldn't. Misa had tracked him down, and now she had trapped him. He heard the hammer of Misa's gun click into place. "I will make you pay, Light. And this time..." She took one step forward. Another. "... this time, I won't let you run away."

Something in Light's brain finally awakened. Panic fired in his nerves. Misa's gun went off.

Light lunged forward. He instinctively swerved, narrowly avoiding the bullet Misa had fired. He crashed into her and in one fluid motion struck first at her head, then her hand. Her gun went flying and skittered across the gleaming pavement. Misa quickly regained her senses and lashed out at Light, her nails bared. Light blocked her and tried to land a blow on her stomach, where he knew she was sensitive. Before his hand had even gotten close, she'd caught it, dug her nails in, and thrown Light to the ground.

Light sprang back up only to be struck in the head, then his chest, and another hit at his collarbone, sending him stumbling backwards. Something was wrong. Misa had never fought him like this before. Light rolled sideways, just barely avoiding a forceful kick from Misa, and pushed himself back to his feet. He raised his hands just in time to block another strike. He spun around and kicked Misa in the chest.

She skidded back, her bare feet scraping on the slippery asphalt. Misa winced, but somehow managed to suck it up and throw herself at Light again. He tried to block her again, but she was too fast. Pain exploded at the back of Light's neck, and he dropped to the ground. Misa landed her kick this time. Light skidded sideways and smacked against the curb. A salty, metallic taste flooded his mouth. He coughed and forced himself onto all fours. Light looked back at Misa to see that she was once again headed for him. He slipped a hand into the hidden pocket of his jacket. He'd lost his first pistol in the lab at the institute, but his second was still where it belonged. He grabbed it, aimed, and fired three bullets into Misa's chest.

Misa reeled backward, shrieking in pain. Light knew that the bullets wouldn't kill her, but if he could hold her back long enough, he could possibly escape. The strange metallic taste in his mouth was still there. Light spat blood onto the pavement. This wasn't good. He dragged himself to his feet and began running again.

A gun fired. Pain blossomed in Light's ankle, and he stumbled. He turned around. Misa had gotten her gun back, and she was chasing after him. She fired again. Light dodged in a random direction, and he felt a wave of hot air rush past his neck. He shot back at her, but he knew it was hopeless. He couldn't kill Misa. She wasn't mortal anymore.

Light felt another bullet hit his shoulder, then his wrist. His pistol dropped to the ground, useless. His chest heaved. Blood rose up in his mouth again. He looked up. Misa was standing in front of him, tears streaming down her face. She drew a deep, shuddering breath. "Goodbye, Light."

Pain ripped through Light's chest, and he fell to the ground.

0o0o0o0o

L ran through the rain-soaked streets, his heart pounding. Why was he still here? There was no way that he would find Light. His frantic searching was pointless. Yet he was still here, running around in the pouring rain like a lost puppy trying to find its owner. He would never find him. That was it. He had to get back to the ship. Enough with the hopeless searching.

The bright lights of the city began to dim down and became a cool, dim glow of electric street lights. He'd reached a residential area. So that was how far he'd gone.

L slipped a hand into his pocket to get his phone. He had to call back to the ship, find out a jackout site, and get out before anything else went wrong. He was just about to press the call button when he heard a noise. An explosion. Something like...

Gunfire. There was a fight going on. Above the noise, a voice carried through the cold, humid air, high, sweet but somehow cold and vicious. Misa. If she was there, then...

Light. He'd finally found him. L took off down the street.

As L wound his way through the maze of streets, the sounds slowly grew louder. He heard a high-pitched shriek. Misa must have been hurt. Maybe Light was getting away. Or...

No. No, he couldn't bear to think about it. L pushed the thought away and kept running. The sounds were clearer than ever now. More gunfire. More sounds of struggle. He was so close. He could feel it. Then Misa's voice rose above the noise once again. This time he could hear the words she was saying.

"Goodbye, Light."

L skidded to a stop at the end of the street. Light. He was standing there, right in front of Misa, weak, bleeding, deathly still. Then the gunfire. Each sound was like an explosion. L's eyes went wide. Light shuddered with each hit. A huge, dark red stain blossomed over his chest. Misa fired one last bullet. Light staggered back and collapsed. He didn't get up.

L was frozen. He stared forward, eyes huge and unblinking. No. It couldn't be. This couldn't be happening. But there he was. Light, his precious Light, lying deathly still in a pool of blood. Misa was still standing there, looking at him with some unreadable expression on her face.

"No..."

A tear streaked over L's cheek. He was too late.

Before he could think, L had reached for his ninjato sword in its sheath at his hip. Rage burned white-hot in his heart. Misa had done this. This was her fault. She would pay. L let out an anguished scream and ran forward.

Misa turned to face him. Too slow. L lunged and stabbed his sword into her throat, just above her collarbone. Misa's eyes went wide in surprise and she staggered back. Bright red bubbled up around the edges of the small sword at her throat. Misa choked and clawed at the blade buried halfway into her flesh. Without missing a beat, L grabbed the hilt, pulled it back and thrust it forward again, this time landing a perfect blow at Misa's cold, lifeless heart. She shuddered, let out a strangled cry and collapsed.

L fell to his knees and drove his sword down again. Blood spurted up from the wound. Misa screamed, the earsplitting noise muffled by the blood that was flooding her throat. L didn't stop. He pulled his sword back and struck down again. And again. And again. Tears streamed over his face as he stabbed Misa over and over.

"How... could you... do this... to him?!"

Misa shrieked in protest, blood spilling from her mouth. L kept stabbing her, her chest slowly falling apart under his blade. Something else began leaking out. Mixed in with the blood were strains of black, glittering fluid. It flowed freely out of Misa's core and spilled out onto the ground. Rem's ashes. Her shinigami power.

Misa let out one last strangled scream. She choked and convulsed, then went still. Her eyes stared up at L, glassy and blank. Dead.

L dropped his sword beside Misa's body. It clattered against the ground, stained with blood and shinigami essence. He stood up and looked down at Misa. She was lying there, still as a doll, her eyes staring blankly up, her torso ripped to pieces. He'd done it. He'd finally done it. L turned away from Misa and looked through the darkness and mist of rain. His gaze fell on the silhouette of another body lying deathly still on the ground. Light.

L felt his heart shatter inside him like glass. He spun around and ran toward whatever was left of Light. He was lying on the sidewalk, soaked from the rain, blood pouring from his chest and pooling around him. L moved closer and knelt down next to him. Light let out a faint whisper of a breath. He was still just barely alive.

Suddenly, Light twitched. He took in a deep, shuddering breath. His eyes opened. "L?" he whispered.

"Oh, god..." With tears stinging at his eyes, L reached out and gently brushed his hand over Light's forehead. "Light... It's me... I- I'm so sorry..."

"L, I-" Light choked. A trickle of blood ran from the side of his lips. L wiped it away and slipped his hands under Light's head and shoulders, cradling him close.

"Light, it's okay. It's okay, I'm here." He held Light closer and kissed his bloodstained forehead. "I'm so sorry... I- I shouldn't have left you..."

Light took another weak, gasping breath. "It's okay, L. I... forgive you..."

"No. No, no no no no..." L murmured. "Light, don't talk like that. We'll get out of this. together. Just..." He reached into his pocket and grabbed his phone. "I'm going to call the ship. Just a minute. That's all. Then we'll get out of here and it'll be okay. Just, please... Hang on, Light..." He fell silent, his words becoming nothing but choked, quiet sobs.

"Don't... cry..." Light reached up one hand to L's face and brushed his fingers over his cheek, wiping away his tears. L froze as Light's hand moved to the back of his neck. Light dragged himself up from L's lap and brought himself face to face with L. Cupping L's face in his hand, he closed his eyes and kissed him one last time.

L wrapped his arms around Light and held him tightly, unwilling to let him go. Light was so weak... But here he was, still determined to give him one last, heartfelt, blood-flavored kiss goodbye. L felt his tears falling uncontrollably, mixing with the cold drops of rain. Light pulled away and opened his eyes. He looked at L's tearstained face. "L..." he breathed.

"No." L clung to Light and buried his face in his shoulder. "Please. It can't end like this..."

"L, I..." Light whispered. He brushed his fingers against Light's cheek. "I... love you..."

L's breath caught in his throat. He felt Light slowly fading away, growing weaker with every second. He held Light close against himself and kissed his cheek. "I love you too..."

Light's head leaned against L's shoulder. L felt his weak, steady pulse slow down. Suddenly, it stopped. Light exhaled against L's neck. Then he was going limp, slipping away from L's arms. L caught him before he hit the ground. "Light!" he screamed. He clutched him close, burying his face in his chest, sobbing. "Light... Please, don't... I..."

No response. L stared down at Light. His face was pale and serene, his eyes closed. His soaked hair was plastered against his forehead. Some of the blood that covered Light's ruined chest had stained L's own clothing. So much blood.

Light was gone. L couldn't take it anymore. This couldn't be happening. It just couldn't. He sobbed uncontrollably, then threw back his head and let out a scream loud enough to wake the dead.

Only it didn't.

0o0o0o0o0

L had no idea what time it was. He didn't care. He knew he wouldn't be getting any sleep tonight anyway.

When he had finally returned to the real world, it was far too late to save Light. He'd been dead since before the payphone had started ringing. The crew hadn't known why L had been crying. He was sobbing too hard to answer any of them. He was lucky that Mello had known enough about him and Light to explain.

Now he was lying here, alone in the dark, trying to get some sleep, slip away from this horrible nightmare that his life had become. Matt had finished the mission and established the connection to Near's computer. He was probably sending messages to him right now. The mission had been a success. At least there was that.

L rolled over and pressed his face into his pillow. He couldn't stop thinking about Light. Two weeks. He'd been free for two weeks. In that short time, he had changed completely, found himself again, turned his life around, destroyed his past and fallen in love. Then he died. It was over just as quickly as it had started.

L thought back to the day Light had first shown up in the real world. He'd thought he was a monster. Everything he'd done since he'd become Kira had haunted him since then. L knew that it wasn't true. Light really was good. Even if he'd had to lose everything to prove it.

L raised his head and looked at the digital clock next to his bed. 2:26 am. So that's what the time was. Light would be asleep by now.

L closed his eyes. He'd meant it when he said he loved Light. He had for years, long before Light had admitted his own feelings for him. At least now he knew for sure that Light had felt the same. L took a deep breath. At least he had that.

Minutes passed. L was starting to drift off. The thoughts of Light still wouldn't stop. But the pain wasn't nearly so bad anymore. L still had the memories of him. Maybe he could get by on that.

_I'll miss you , Light._ L thought as he slowly drifted off to sleep._ I don't know if you know how much this means to me, but I know now. You didn't just survive after you were rescued. You changed everything. For the first time in your life, you were actually something more than alive. And... I love you for that. I love you, Light._

For a second, just before falling into sleep, L thought he heard a whisper in the dark.

_I love you too, L._


End file.
